


The Strange Second Life Of Charlie Swan

by TheOneWhoStayed



Series: Dark and Light [The Sound of Grey] [3]
Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, BAMF Carlisle Cullen, Bamf Charlie Swan, Blood Lust, Canon-Typical Violence, Charlie Swan is so lost, Charlie is a Good Dad, Coven Dynamics, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, F/M, Falling In Love, Father-Daughter Relationship, Gen, Glimpses into Charlie's Newborn months, He tries so hard, Hopeful Ending, Lawful Neutral Volturi, Not Good and Not Evil Volturi, Re-Cap in first chapter, Slice of Life, Soul Bond, Vampire Charlie Swan, Vampire Turning, this poor man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:49:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 42,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26095885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOneWhoStayed/pseuds/TheOneWhoStayed
Summary: Irina had the kind of face that Sailors of old saw when they heard siren songs, it was a startling thought as Charlie had never considered himself capable of such flights of fancy.Yet, as much as he wanted to stare at her for hours, all his focus was on the man idling almost patiently outside the cottage.Carlisle Cullen stood there in a messy button up and slacks, his stupid face looked even more perfect than Charlie remembered. Suddenly, Charlie was filled with such blind rage that he was overtaken by the unrestrainable urge to punch him.[Alternatively Titled: Charlie Swan And The Horrible, No good, Very Bad Year And A Half.]
Relationships: Bella Swan & Charlie Swan, Carlisle Cullen/Bella Swan (referenced), Charlie Swan/Irina
Series: Dark and Light [The Sound of Grey] [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820770
Comments: 263
Kudos: 290





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back to the chaos!!! 
> 
> This first chapter is just a recap/hi-light reel of Charlie's head space during Equinox/Full Moon. It's not detailed it's more of a stream of consciousness but the rest of the chapters will be more traditionally written. 
> 
> This is only the prologue after all!
> 
> I want to thank all of you for waiting so patiently and it's good to be back! This is going to be written leisurly and won't be updated daily because im going to also be outlining the next book as i write this!

Charlie Swan never put too much thought into his friendship with Carlisle Cullen.

They _were_ friends.

Charlie wasn't the kind of guy to idle in the aisle of a grocery store chatting about the World Series with people he didn't like or barely tolerated. Sure, they were just friends from work but there were a hundred types of friends people had before knocking a person down to the level of 'acquaintance'.

Carlisle was a guy Charlie could respect.

He'd rolled into town with 5 kids and medical qualifications that the Hospital was really aching for, right alongside credentials the Station had been sorely needing since Old Oakley had retired from his job as the Coroner.

On good days, Forks had been leaning on the Port Angeles Coroner. Bad ones had them waiting for Seattle to get the time to send a guy down.

So Dr. Cullen had really been a blessing to the place.

It was pretty strange then, when Harry and Billy started trying to talk Charlie out of being so friendly to the guy. Especially since gossip was already burning through the place like wild because the Cullens had practically remolded that old house down the forest road into a mansion and they all drove cars that would have an action star drooling.

Sure, the guy clearly came from old money, probably had a dad who left him sitting pretty. But Charlie respected the fact that Carlisle didn't just let that make him idle, instead the guy became a Doctor in a small town because he didn't need money.

Here was the thing though... Harry and Billy were Charlie's best friends. They'd grown up together as a trio of idiots running across Forks just being kids. So Charlie was willing to listen when they practically declared that Carlisle Cullen was a demon from the darkest pit of hell who'd' arrived to kill their children.

Only...

That's all they'd say.

"He doesn't have a good reputation."

That was it.

And Charlie was a man who worked on facts, not hearsay, definitely not crack pot theories. Charlie Swan was damn good at reading people and knowing their intentions. Sometimes it felt like the world around him was in slow motion as he gathered up all he could manage about a person's clothes, attitude and even just the way they walked.

He was a damn good cop because of it. After all, he hand't made Chief of Police at 35 because he chased wild nonsense.

Even a list of supposed crimes that Charlie could run a check on would be enough for him to accept Carlisle was an asshole who was just good at pretending. So good that Charlie's read on him failed completely.

Because from what Charlie could see, the guy honestly was just trying to make a home in Forks with his kids and do their community a little good. Sure they were a bit.. Odd.

Half of the kids were dating but they weren't related and they hadn't actually been raised together. So, Charlie just thought of it as a bit unconventional and moved the hell on because people talked about him too.

His own reputation was generally good but most didn't' like that he absolutely refused to partake in idle talk, while also being unwilling to unload about the fact that his wife left him only to start dating guys whose ages were... A bit lower than you'd expect from a woman of 40.

Charlie knew a reputation wasn't always true.

Terrance Mallory came to mind in that case. The guy owned the bank and, until Carlisle, had been the richest man in town. Mallory ran most of the charity events as well as the food drives, but Charlie knew damn well the guy was sleeping with at least half a dozen women who weren't his wife.

And even worse, Derek had caught the guy parked on a shoulder illegally on the highway getting a bit too knowledgeable about a 19 year old girl from Seattle.

So yeah.

Charlie wasn't going to ostracize Carlisle when all Harry and Billy could say was that he had a 'bad reputation'.

But yeah, Charlie never really thought about his friendship with Carlisle unless the guy was in front of him and had a second to chat for a moment about sports, camping, fishing, hunting, and even a few of the hikes they'd each been on.

There was no reason for him to.

Especially when Bella called that fateful December and asked if she could live with him.

Charlie's life was about to change completely because his baby girl was going to be making the place she'd carved in his world her permanent residence.

Life was good.

He was thoroughly convinced that it was going to be the best year of his life to have Bella with him, living there day to day, going to school and doing her homework at the kitchen table. Maybe even making friends beyond Jacob.

Charlie didn't know what their life was going to look like but he couldn't wait to find out.

God, how he wished he could go back to having those rose colored glasses and dreams of brand new golden memories to be made. Because Charlie didn't even once spare a single notion for Carlisle as Bella arrived at the airport and the two Swans had shuffled about, not really huggers but also ecstatic to see each other, but he should have.

Because every time he'd think back on that day Charlie would.

Life with Bella started out a little stilted.

Neither of them were talkers and Bella could sit and stare out at the cars going by with the best of them. She was a shy girl but Charlie could see how beautiful she was becoming.

Bella was like a flower that had only half bloomed, the kind of girl who'd stop traffic when she was a woman. Still though she was quiet and books were her only friends for most of her life.

Sometimes having her around was like living with a ghost with how much work she'd taken over around the house with cooking and cleaning, but never saying anything. Charlie knew that was her way of saying she loved him.

Bella gave and gave of herself. That's what she did.

So Charlie tried to say he loved her too.

The Beast, or the truck he'd managed to get off Billy, was his first gesture and the girl had loved it to death. He didn't know it then, but that truck would see days and years it had no right seeing with how old it would eventually be.

When Bella got into an accident at school and nearly been crushed by an idiot's van in the school parking lot, he'd nearly had a heart attack. Honestly, he was on the verge of screaming as he drove like a maniac to the hospital the moment he'd been told what happened to his baby girl.

It started there.

His bad year.

Not at the hospital, though he'd later learn that was definitely part of it. But that day Bella nearly died on his watch before he'd had her a complete month?

Yeah it had started there.

At the hospital though was where the real magic was happening and Charlie hadn't know it back then.

When he'd gotten to his daughter she'd been stone faced and completely unfazed by the fact that she'd nearly died and all Charlie wanted was to hold her and tell her it was alright because he was there. Bella and him weren't like that though. He couldn't do that without the girl thinking he'd been told she was dying or something equally dramatic.

So he'd put his hands on his hips while performing breathing exercises so as not to panic while Nurse Hannady took Bella's vitals in the ER.

Then Carlisle arrived.

Charlie had seen him with girls before. Women too who tried to flutter their eyes as they pulled at their collars because Dr. Cullen was honestly too hot to handle for most women. Hell, Charlie would admit the guy was something else.

Most actors had an inch of make up on for their movies and photo shoots, they also had computers to erase all the things that made them Human.

Carlisle though? He looked like he'd walked off a magazine cover and did it naturally.

So it was funny to see women flounder around him while he was polite and also rather chilly towards anything more than a veiled overture. It was better than Mariner Highlights to see the guy very coldly tell women 'No THANK YOU' in the aisle that kept the lunch meats.

Now that was a reputation Charlie knew to be true. Carlisle Cullen was colder than the north pole if you so much as looked at him with intent to seduce. Whether it was, like Charlie himself, because he'd risked his heart once and been burned, or because he just didn't' want to settle down completely yet, nobody knew.

Still though.

It gave Charlie a near stroke when Bella's tongue fell out of her head at the sight of him and Carlisle only smiled back like he was egging her on. The Doctor's eyes were practically twinkling like stars as he leaned his hip on the gurney _Charlie's daughter_ was siting on and essentially loomed over Bella like she was a 28 year old blonde bombshell which had other guys panting like animals.

Carlisle's normally soft as well as kind voice had dipped into dangerous territories and right when Charlie was about to tell him to step the hell off before demanding to know what the fuck he thought he was doing, the Doctor snapped out of it.

Ramrod straight he stood about two feet away and was back to being the Carlisle who Charlie knew.

So he got worried a bit.

Jotted it down but was prepared to write it off as stress or a fever dream.

He could only do so much when Bella wouldn't talk though, especially when she was failing to reach out to anybody. No friends were coming over for studies and even Jacob Black seemed to have to drag Bella out to his house whenever they hung out.

Really he shouldn't have been as happy as he was when Bella had asked to go shopping for Prom dresses with her friends, even though she wasn't actually going to the damn thing. It meant she was connecting to people and really, of course Charlie was going to let her go.

Especially when she referred to the group as 'the girls'. Really it was all he wanted for her. To carve out a life here with him instead of just passing time until she could trek out on her own because Renee had outgrown the need for a daughter.

How could he have known that the end had already started?

Charlie finally wrote off that scene in the ER when Bella started going to the Cullens so often because he was pretty sure Bella was dating Edward or, at least, Edward was crushing on her so hard that Carlisle had just been weirdly scoping her out that day.

That's what made sense in the world where Carlisle was a 32 year old man and Bella was 17.

_He should have fucking known better._

But, Carlisle had more evidence that said he was a great guy, a loving father, and just an all around decent person than anything which pointed otherwise. So Charlie DID write it off.

Wrote it off so thoroughly that he was fine with Bella going with the Cullens on a hiking trip.

Hiking...

Bella was allergic to the outdoors and she was going hiking! Charlie realized that she probably liked Edward right back and his brain clung to that hope like a rabid animal.

He was really only fooling himself.

Charlie even ignored the damned scarf Bella had come home with from that trip, even when Carlisle had shown up wearing it in order to make the call on Waylon's COD.

Because he trusted that Carlisle was a good guy and on the off chance that he wasn't, Bella was smart enough to run screaming if a man tried anything on her that made her uncomfortable. She was the kind of girl who saw a pretty face and didn't really flinch over the initial teenage hormonal response.

Renee was always calling Bella an old lady in a teenager's body and while that was partly true Charlie also knew it had a lot to do with the way her mother had raised her. It was a bit shameful really that Bella's quiet calm, her responsibility, and her wisdom all came from the fact that Renee hadn't know how to be a mother.

So Bella had stepped up to the plate, while Charlie could only watch and do his best to give her a small window of childhood during the summers.

Bella was like a lighthouse during the day, unmoving and silent, people only cared about them when they were too close to the cliffs.

But she wasn't the kind of girl men like Terrance Mallory wanted.

Bella's beauty came from the silent steel in her bones as she could sit sedately while the world passed her by and no one would notice. Never crying out because it never helped before, and never asking because whenever she had, Bella had never received.

Sometimes it felt like only he could see her.

Because Charlie knew that feeling exactly and it ached to know his precious girl did too.

His greatest fear was that the man who finally might notice her, loved her right, and became the place she could let herself cry and become weak...

Well, he might just not exist.

Men like that just weren't made anymore.

They hadn't been for a very long time.

These days ones who did seek out girls like Bella just wanted to take and take until they crumbled silently under the strain. Fortunately Bella was smart as a whip and, if she were like him, had twice the fight in her so Charlie knew she'd never submit herself to a guy like that.

Which was why he was so confused over the Arizona Fiasco.

Edward was clearly interested in her, practically chasing her around like a bored pup chased it's tail, but Bella looked at him... _Like he was a bored pup chasing his tail._

She didn't look at him the way she looked at Carlisle. The way Bella lit up when the man winked at her as if he had a _right_ to try and make her laugh.

Charlie didn't like it one bit.

Except, later that same day, Carlisle was also seen grabbing Edward and ruffling his hair before kissing the boy on the head. Charlie witnessed as the Doctor slung an arm around the copper haired kid's shoulders and shook him with such raw affection that it was clear that Carlisle was just like that.

A layer to him had been revealed to Charlie, one that had never been seen before and it was assuring.

The smiles, the winking, the scarf had all just been a young father trying his best to welcome his kids friend into the fold. As if Bella was just another one of his litter.

And Bella was just a red blooded female who probably had a cute little baby crush on the guy.... That was normal. Girls got innocent crushes on older guys all the time. Especially good men like Carlisle who were kind and never made them feel like they were stupid or just silly kids.

God Charlie had felt a weight lift off him and in the depths of his heart the man hoped the year would finally start getting better, even more so when Bella promised not to leave again. That she'd stay with him in Forks because it was her home.

Fuck him though because it got worse.

Not all at once.

At first, Bella started making nice with Leah Clearwater like something out of Charlie's wildest dreams to have his and Harry's girls become friends. It was only too bad Rebecca and Rachel were long gone or it would have been something nearly legendary.

Especially since Bella hosted her slumber party at _their house_.

In _her_ room! They bought pizza and watched stupid movies and Charlie was beginning to feel like Bella truly was home now. Being a kid and hanging out with other girls, talking about boys and maybe even opening up her heart to them.

She'd even asked to go fishing with him.

Charlie truly was living his best life in that small window of time before it all went to hell in a hand basket addressed to Satan himself.

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing could describe the desolation he'd experienced that night when the two Swans had arrived home from their fishing trip with the Clearwaters.

Bella had left the camera on the table and naturally Charlie began running though it. He'd bought the damn thing, of course he knew how to work it, so the man had moved it to the beginning of their fishing pictures and started scrolling it to see Seth, Harry, himself, and even Bella out on the lake in the sun.

They were happy.

Then suddenly there was a pair of very fine hands holding a very tiny but elegant cake with an 18 on it.

He realized that it must have been pictures of her Birthday party with the Cullens so, being a bit nosy, Charlie kept scrolling to see if Edward was still chomping at the bit or if he'd given up.

Instead he found Carlisle feeding Bella cake and looking at her like she was the one about to be eaten.

Everything fell apart then.

And it was Charlie's own damn fault that his baby girl was running off to only God knew where Alaska with a man who was nearly old enough to be her father. A man older than Renee's husband.

A man who Charlie had been wrong about.

Carlisle was the worst kind of predator, he was a man who waited and waited, passing by the rose bush until he found away to grab the flower without being pricked by it's defensive thorns. The Doctor would then proceed to only pluck a half bloomed bud in order to pry it opened because that's what he liked.

Breaking things.

Cracking opened girl's like Bella until they surrendered to him thinking that he loved them. There was nothing that would change Charlie's mind about the monster either. (There was but that came with a whole other level of trauma which he would deal with in turn.)

It got worse and worse as Billy and Harry arrived to deliver their tender 'I told you so's' while also very thinly implying it wasn't as bad as it could be.

As if Charlie's life wasn't ending right then and there while Carlisle Cullen was likely stealing the last of Bella's innocence in Alaska. (He was and Charlie nearly died when Bella admitted it shamelessly.)

They were only the beginning though as every day someone was at his door with a meal and crocodile tears saying what a shame it was that Bella turned out as bad as her mother.

Charlie could only grit his teeth and accept the food before going to bed and crying all over again because this wasn't Renee _at all_.

This was all Charlie.

Charlie who married a woman he barely knew and gave her all his heart and dreamed of a future together only for Renee to say that when she said 'forever' she only meant a second.

Because when things got hard, she got going.

Bella had too much of Charlie himself in her.

And it was a horrifying realization to have too late.

To know she loved like that. So intensely and burned so brightly. It was a wonder Charlie hadn't known but Bella was a solitary mountain and only those she allowed passage were granted her secrets.

Charlie wasn't one of the blessed either.

Death was coming for him every morning that Bella was away, it seeped into his bones and Charlie nearly lost his temper when Derek asked if he was going to press charges. Charlie really nearly yelled.

Because Bella was 18.

She was 18.

What the hell was he supposed to do?

It was a nightmare which kept on going on endlessly as Bella returned and the fall out kept on raining down like brimstone on judgment day.

Carlisle was apparently back at work and the thought of Bella going to his house, that grown man touching Charlie's baby girl?

It made him sick.

Nauseous and Charlie actually threw up that awful Monday.

Because he was allowing it.

Everyone knew he was letting Bella waltz into that house and be taken advantage of.

Charlie felt like a failure as a man and a father.

In his heart he learned to _hate_.

Because Carlisle had stood in Charlie Swan's own damn house and tried to sell himself as a lonely man who'd just found love in the wrong place at the wrong time but took it anyways. That he'd actually marry Bella, that Carlisle Cullen had never wanted anything like he wanted her.

He'd tried to sell that load of garbage to him and Bella, sweet, smart, Bella had revealed how childish she was as she clearly bought it and just tossed out the warranty.

It was evil that Carlisle could say those things and Charlie couldn't even see a hint of a lie in the bastard.

Worse when Harry had a heart attack and Bella revealed that not only was Cullen working on the guy, but her relationship was the reason Harry had been stressing out. Because he didn't want Bella hanging around Leah when she was obviously ruining her own life.

And, if that wasn't enough of a traumatizing ordeal, then Bella got into a fight. Only for her to reveal she was being bullied and before Charlie could even process any of that...

They were careening out of control off the forest road, and his baby girl was admitting to murdering someone with her thrice dammed boyfriend.

Confessing and begging for Charlie's life to these... things...

Because they weren't people. Their eyes were red and the woman had peeled the car door opened like a sardine can. On top of that their skin was shining like fire as the sun refracted against them...

But one thing...

One thing was sticking out to him...

They were all so beautiful...

Like they'd stepped right from the silver screen and just existed in perfect beauty effortlessly.

And Bella was completely unsurprised by anything coming out of their mouths. The girl clearly recognized one and the man who was holding Charlie, he knew Bella and wanted her alive.

Did he ever really know her?

His own daughter?

It felt like dying all over again to realize that he didn't. Bella was clearly running with a crowd Charlie couldn't even begin to comprehend as in one startling realization the man came to the conclusion that the creatures speaking about torturing them, they were strange yes... But Charlie found them familiar too.

One thought coalesced against all odds in that moment, because Charlie was a damn good cop, and that was that Carlisle Cullen was the same type of creature as whatever these bastards were and so were all his children.

He wouldn't get to ask Bella though, because suddenly his precious baby was screaming and Charlie felt his captor bite into his neck like something out of a bad horror movie.

It wasn't funny though.

Because it burned.

And for a very long time that's all Charlie was capable of thinking.

The only thing he knew.

Fire.

Like hell itself in his veins.

Burning his throat until it was raw and ragged from either screaming or whatever acid had been let loose inside him while his heart pounded echoing in his ears like waves crashing endlessly against the cliff side.

Until it turned cold, like dry ice burning against his skin.

Colder and colder.

Somehow it was worse than the flames.

And then his heart stopped.

But...

Charlie...

Charlie Swan kept living.


	2. November-Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aren't you tired of being nice? Don't you just want to go ape shit?

First.

The very first thing Charlie registered when the pain faded was that it hadn't actually all gone away, no, the fire had simply shrunk down before concentrating itself into his throat. Excruciating was an understatement as the power of it had the man squeezing his eyes shut.

Burning.

Like a a super heated chunk of coal had lodged itself down his esophagus to the point that he immediately sat up hissing, unable to do anything but begin scratching at his throat in a helpless attempt to pry out whatever molten hunk of steel had been shoved into his mouth.

Second.

Was the noise.

Charlie could hear the forest screaming as the cry of insects echoed through his head, along with the beating of a birds wings, accompanied by even the skittering about of perhaps a small animal.

It's tiny heart beat pushing it's blood through it veins as it bounded through the thicket.

Opening his eyes Charlie saw for the first time.

He didn't recognize the room, but it was homely and comfortable in a way that he felt it had practically been crafted for him. The walls were natural wood whose grain he could see as if he were staring at it through a set of binoculars.

Shallow crevices and grooves he could lose himself to with distraction if only the searing pain in his throat would just stop as his mouth was filling up with saliva... but it wasn't quite really the normal liquid he knew as the consistency was nearly viscous like syrup.

The furniture in the room was rustic and an attempt at breathing had him realizing that everything was brand new. Fresh in a way that wasn't from cleaners, but practically stiff from having come strait from the plastic.

The intensity of it all had the man curling up like a child as he gripped his own neck desperately, unable to do anything but wheeze from the horrifying force of it all.

Suddenly he realized, right there next to the small sofa chair across the room of which he could see even the threads which made up it's pattern, there was a woman. He had only noticed her because she'd move, swayed, as if trying to approach him.

Her features were perfect in a way that should have been breathtaking but instead... Instead it was comforting and the burning in his throat almost seemed to lightly mute itself as his chest, which should have held a beating heart, suddenly revealed that it was not empty or hollow.

No.

Something a like a small cut out of a clear blue summer sky stretched out inside of his chest at the very sight of her wavy blond hair, pale skin, all which encompassed a pair of burnt copper eyes.

She was loveliness itself.

"I'm Irina," the words were whispered kindly and Charlie realized that she couldn't be more than 25, maybe 30 if she suffered from a baby face. Her voice was like a song he'd forgotten from childhood but as soon as he heard it...

He remembered all the words.

"Bella says your name is Charlie... I know you must be really scared but the first thing we should do is get you something to drink."

Thirsty.

Oh God.

It came rushing back to him then, in haze of bright lights and colors which seemed muted compared to how he was able to register them all now.

The accident.

Bella.

Those things.

"Bella," Charlie forced out and it was like ripping his own throat to shreds with how violent the pain which surged back up hit him. He didn't care though as he felt a panic rushing through him, it built and crashed like a wave on the sand as he scrambled to his feet,

"Bella! Bella!"

A distant rip registered, a cracking, and a crunching which he'd later discover was him absolutely destroying the bed in his frantic rush to get out of it. All he could manage was to say his daughter's name as it was the only syllable worth suffering such immeasurable pain for.

"She's safe!" Irina soothed her hands up in the universal sign of surrender, but her expression was clearly a bit confused at his actions and words,

"Bella is back in your house with Renee and Leah Clearwater."

Irina was a complete, utter stranger. Yet, that bright blue sky swelled in him as if it was trying to expand the lightness and comfort she provided. Something inside of him demanded that Charlie trust her.

Above all things.

Trust Irina.

Wheezing, Charlie curled in on himself where he stood on a rather tasteful rug with so many little details woven and painted within them it recalled the one Sue kept in the living room of her and Harry's home.

"I can make the burning stop," Irina promised and offered her hand tenderly, "You're thirsty and it means you need to drink."

_What am I? What are you? What is this? Where are we?!_

They were zooming through his brain at a thousand miles an hour but Charlie couldn't voice it because everything was bearing down on him until..

Until Irina stepped forwards and her perfume surrounded him like a safety blanket.

Rain.

Rain on a cool day just after a night of snow.

Without even thinking, Charlie took her hand and was led gently through the most beautiful cottage he'd ever seen.

Of course he'd nearly barreled Irina over in the hall and rammed his shoulder so hard into the wood paneled wall that he'd broken a hole into the poor thing which had the woman laughing brightly as if it was the most amusing thing she'd ever witnessed.

"You're very strong and fast now," the blond chuckled lightly, "We're going to have to go through here slow."

Slow translated to unbearable as Irina practically had him tiptoeing through the place. Which became fine as Charlie's eyes took it all in. The place was all subtlety and gentle earthy colors which offered something like a welcome embrace with how much it rang of comfort.

The cottage was small, three doors in the hall, one which he'd been led out of in near silence by Irina and water in the pipes informed him that there was a bathroom too.

He wished he could speak again and demand to know where he was but the rabid creature clawing inside his windpipes had grown far too aggressive and it seemed like all of his frantic focus was needed to just make it out of the place without breaking anything.

It was a complete failure though as Charlie stumbled a few times going to fast which caused him to ram into the door frame leading out of the hall and obliterating the rather delicate molding. Half way through the living room he realized that if he focused on her perfume then it was easier to just concentrate.

Eventually they made it out though and Charlie realized the forest's cacophony bloomed like an orchestra with the walls of the cottage no longer obstructing it. As if it had been crafted to lightly mute all the racket, if only a little.

Another smell washed over him unlike anything he'd ever experience as it nearly overwhelmed the dying grass as well as the pine and dirt which was wafting into the clearing from the surrounding woods. Immediately he realized there were several bushes lining the front of the little rustic but humble cottage.

Bright green were their leaves though it was the middle of November. There were even little red flowers blooming, scattered about the plants.

Later he'd ask what they were and Irina would have no clue.

Even farther in the future Bella would tell him they were camellias. A flower commonly known to have no fragrance in their non -hybrid form. A flower she felt kinship with as they bloomed in the coldest months. It would be Carlisle who told Charlie what the flowers actually meant.

How stalwart and sturdy they were.

At the moment though Irina was flashing him a smile as if it was Christmas day as she informed him with such tender softness, "We're going to hunt something. How does a Mountain Lion sound?"

His mind was trying to deny what everything in his heart was trying to tell him, and the fact that Irina was talking about eating animals was slightly comforting in his denial.

But she had said 'thirsty' and it made him unable to deny what his brain was screaming.

"Now that we're out of the house... we don't have to go slow anymore," toothy was the grin Irina offered him as she released his hand, before leaping . Impossible was the distance and height which she'd gone as Irina crouched up in the bough of one of the might oaks just a few yards ahead of him.

Playful exuberance shone in the woman's eyes as she called back to him, "C'mon!"

Charlie crouched a bit.

Unsure.

Knowing he'd been altered enough to crumble a wall and damage a doorway but that? That was something completely different.

"Don't think," Irina's tone was a joyful sound, "Just focus on your destination and leap."

Trust in her.

It was nearly innate as he crouched lower and pushed his feet against the ground forcefully, bounding forwards.

Exhilarating.

Flying, this was what flying felt like as everything around him seemed to slow as he rushed through the branches and leaves, going and going.

His body moved before he even needed to think.

That boulder is safe, that branch is unstable, bounce off that trunk.

It all came instantly.

Knowledge he'd never had just rushing to him, knowing how to move like an animal through the forest, as if he had lived there his whole life as part of the natural order.

Several times Charlie landed too hard.

Crushed a boulder which had seemed immovable or fell a tree which should have been able to take his weight.

Irina kept laughing like a child and it brought him ease. Knowing this was what she expected, this was normal for whatever the hell was happening

He froze.

Suddenly.

As a heartbeat reached in his ears pounding away, far closer than that small creature had been, and the rush of blood in veins filled his senses.

Irina lifted her nose to the air before inhaling. Scenting, as if she could inspect it, Charlie copied her and while it scorched his throat harshly, through all the smells and scents of the forest one thing stood out. Something tangy and musky all at once. It coated his mouth and that viscous saliva filled his cheeks but it wasn't quit right.

It didn't smell good per say... But it did register as something the monster in his larynx was practically clambering out towards.

"You smell that?" Irina grinned, still glowing with enthusiasm, "That's a bear. Let's go get it for you."

Irina led the way and Charlie's brain sort of registered everything she was doing as if he was waking up an remembering exactly what to do in this situation. The woman guided him downwind, then proceeded to stalk the animal like it was the prey. He wasn't quite sure yet what this was leading too but everything in him cried out in desire for it.

The terror of not knowing was agitating him but Irina's scent was managing to keep him from absolutely gnashing his teeth. Though the moment his eyes landed on the creature they'd stalked...

Something else took over him.

Primal as well as feral, his brain completely shut down further and Charlie experienced the entire ride as if he was in the back seat.

While the rest of him crouched, low, inched closer, his breathing which had been sporadic completely ceased as Charlie lost himself to the pure wild thing which had been born in him while he'd been screaming for death.

He rushed the bear, all the while in the back of his mind he was screaming wondering what the hell he was doing, but his body? It had already been given an education as he moved faster than the massive bear which registered him and moved to fight.

Charlie would have normally cried out in surprise as the creature lashed out at him, but he was faster as he grabbed the bear's paw as easily a stopping a small child in it's tracks, the bones crunched under his grip, causing the animal to roar viciously. Charlie could smell the heady aroma of what his brain informed him was the broken blood vessels under the skin while the snapping echoed in his ears.

Before the creature could attempt to swat at him again, the man's body moved once more, lunging forwards, baring his own teeth before ripping into the animals neck as if it was made of paper.

Blood gushed into his mouth and Charlie lost himself to the liquid heat which sent everything in him careening into a frenzy as the blood coated his mouth. It's flavor was a bit off, as if it wasn't quite what he truly desired but it would do at the moment. Charlie was lost to guzzling down the elixir as if his very life depended on it.

Finally, when the flow ceased and he knew intellectually that he'd gulped down every drop he could manage, Charlie fell back onto his rear into the grass of the woods and found the heat inside his throat had been slaked as if the smoldering coals which had been piling up there had been drenched in water.

Still he was itching for something more satisfying but he wasn't actually thirsty...

His mind became clearer then.

The world focused and Charlie was no longer blinded by the monster which had been clambering for him to sate the heat.

How blindly he had followed this woman who promised him that she could cool the fire, how he had shaken and barely questioned his situation because nothing mattered as much as that promise.

"What's happening to me?" all the horror and panic at what he'd just done tumbled out as he gave voice to the question.

Charlie realized that his voice sounded unlike his own but still familiar, it was jarring and rattled his bones as Irina sort of ambled into the clearing at an impossible speed he was shockingly capable of tracking.

He'd just been moving like that? Hadn't he?

Charlie wasn't scared. In that moment he was terrified.

"You were bitten by a Vampire," Irina laid it out plainly.

And he knew.

Charlie had just been fighting it.

Because it was absolutely _bonkers_.

Just like he'd fought back against the idea of Carlisle chasing down Bella like an animal in heat.

Carlisle.

"Cullen is a Vampire too," His voice was cracking like an idiot, he knew. Perhaps if he'd just been given this as objective facts he'd be calmer. This was Charlie's 'Welcome to the Club' conversation though, and that itself was enough to make him feel like he'd been dropped on his head into Wonderland... Or some other circle of hell.

"His family are cousins to mine," Irina smiled, softly, gently, as if she was scared he was going to break. Which was fair really, "Our Covens feed only on animal blood."

"But other's don't."

"No."

"Like the ones that are after Bella."

"All of the Vampires from that day, are dead except for the girl," was the rather assuring response and Charlie's body shuddered but did not sigh.

His hackles rose again though as she rather nervously added, "And there was one Vampire who is after her that didn't show her face that day, but the Cullens are keeping watch for her."

Tucking his knees up, Charlie cradled his head in his hands, forcing himself not to weep or cry out with the anguish and rage which was suddenly ripping through him like a tornado in a toy house.

He shuddered with the force of it as he realized that Bella had known all this time.

She hadn't just been keeping the secret of her ill advised relationship with Carlisle under wraps. She'd been hiding this too.

And because Charlie wasn't an idiot he lifted his face from his hands to stare at Irina whose eyes were still shining with eagerness, their copper color a bit darker somehow.

"What did you do to me? I shouldn't trust you. I don't know you. Who the hell are you?"

It was more aggressive than he intended but he was relieved, despite the mounting irritation beginning to itch under his skin, that Irina didn't flinch or move away from him.

"Vampires..." she trailed a bit as if unsure whether or not it was the time but Charlie stared at her, frustration mounting as the blue sky inside of him began turning a bit grey and stormy.

As if she could feel it too, the blond trudged on with a level of seriousness she hadn't displayed until that moment,

"When we find the perfect match for us, the one person in all of history and the world which we would be able to love forever, be capable of returning that love... All that potential becomes a Bond.

"That feeling in your chest? That's a part of me that's reached out to call you, tell you that I'm here."

Irina placed her hand on her chest then, right where Charlie felt that slice of the sky in his own,

"I feel you too. The more time we spend together, the more we fall in love... It'll grow stronger and when-"

She cut herself off then as the woman crouched down in front of him only to fall back lightly on her rear so she was mirroring his own sitting position of having her knees tucked up to her chest, " If.. If we decide to be together, we can make it permanent.

"Not even destruction or death will be able to break it."

It was a lot.

But something in him was screaming that it was true.

As if he'd known that too somewhere tangled with all the strange new instincts like the one which had told him how to kill a bear with his bare hands and rip it's throat out.

He'd never thought of doing that before.

But here he was doing just that.

Like an insane person.

"Oh God," Charlie nearly groaned but managed to crush all his panic. They were sitting here talking about Vampires.

And magic.

And soulmates.

Like this happened everyday.

Because it apparently did.

A man he'd known for 3 years, had worked with, shook his hand, and held entire conversations with next to the baked beans, was a Vampire.

"How old are you?" was all he could manage to spit out because the alternative was asking how old Carlisle was and Charlie wasn't ready for that.

"Not sure," Irina shrugged a bit, as if it was everyday someone admitted to being so old they'd lost track,

"I was born early 1000's AD, Scandinavia. But we didn't' keep track of those things very closely in those days."

Over 1000.

The entirety of his world was crashing down around him the more she spoke. Like shards of glass falling and piercing the ground revealing he'd lived his life in a snow globe.

What made it worse was the fact that Bella had discovered a door in the clear dome but kept silent about it. She'd walked in this world everyday and just bore it with her steel bones and iron skin.

His throat was starting to begin itching all over, without warning Irina stood slowly, "I've been sitting with you through your Change. it's been three days since the accident and I was in the middle of a hunt with my sister.

"I need something to drink too."

Charlie swallowed down whatever the hell it was had been filling his mouth because he was beginning to think it wasn't saliva.

"I'm.."

He didn't want to say it.

That he was still...

Thirsty...

"I know," Irina's expression was soft as if she really did know, as if he didn't actually have to say it,

"You will be nearly insatiable until your Newborn Months are over."

The heat was returning so Charlie once again permitted her to lead him towards fresh blood. They hunted until Irina's eyes were shimmering gold and if his heart hadn't stopped then, oh it would have.

It would have.

As the shade of them were a color that surely hadn't been named yet. Charlie's brain was puzzling together all the oddities that the Cullens presented and he'd just swiped away because it was really none of his business.

Their eyes.

The pale skin.

Absences on sunny days.

How Irina shone like diamonds on fire when the cloud cover failed for a moment and Charlie found all his senses zeroed in on her as she shimmered.

He hadn't even thought to spare a glance at his own skin until the clouds had returned. There was no way it was not similar, but he was sure his flesh didn't have the same luster.

Together they ran through the forest and Irina answered his questions.

Charlie had so.. So Many.

Plenty he refused to ask too.

Wasn't ready to know the answers too.

But he did find himself shaking away the horror and disbelief enough to pressed forwards, "So the Bond thing can break?"

"Yes. With time and distance."

Right... He'd ask how it became permanent later.

"Other Vampires.. They just kill people?"

"You're still new. There's a mental shift that slowly occurs and you'll begin to see things less as a Human would. Some Vampires shed their ability to care about Humans at all."

It was horrifying to hear that he'd slowly change, but his body was already a stranger. Strength, speed, all of his 5 senses were in over drive and Charlie was close to loosing his mind.

Clinging delicately to what was left of his life.

"Focus on the memories you want to keep. A Vampire's mind is unfading but as your Human mentality slips away you begin to lose things.

"If you think on the important ones though, they'll transfer over and stay forever."

Charlie stared out to the trees, into the dark which he closed his eyes against because, he could see beyond it,

"A Vampire bit me and I became one."

It wasn't a question but Irina answered anyways, "We're venomous. Venom is the only thing our bodies produce."

Their forest walk ended as they slowly ambled-well It wasn't slow, but it wasn't the fastest he could go-Charlie found himself easily recognizing the path back to that cottage.

He remembered the trees and the rocks, the bushes, as well as the fox den just off that way...

It was enough to have him gritting his teeth at how alien his mind was becoming.

Then, on the wind, a whisper of something hit his nose and Venom pooled in his mouth... Venom...

The smell of it was like harsh cleaners and old polish.

Everything in him cried out that it was MALE.

Charlie's entire body went rigid as Irina placed a gentle hand to the place between his shoulder blades. Her song like voice coming from the side of him,

"It's alright... Keep going."

He didn't' want to, but Charlie knew he'd been in that cottage for 3 days and anyone who might be aware of it's location likely owned it or had a right to be there. So Charlie grit his teeth as he trudged forwards cautiously.

Eyes flickering to Irina constantly in order to ensure she was still safe.

By his side.

Charlie was getting a bit scared of himself as he'd never been so protective and nearly wild with it but he couldn't take his eyes off Irina in his frantic state while the smell of that man grew stronger on the wind.

Finally they reached the cottage and Charlie tore his gaze from Irina only to regret it.

See... Irina had the kind of face that Sailors of old saw when they heard siren songs, it was a startling thought as Charlie had never considered himself capable of such flights of fancy.

Yet, as much as he wanted to stare at her for hours, all his focus was on the man idling almost patiently outside the cottage.

Carlisle Cullen stood there in a messy button up and slacks, his stupid face looked even more perfect than Charlie remembered. Suddenly, Charlie was filled with such blind rage that he was overtaken by the unrestrainable urge to punch him.

So, in a hardly thought out rush, Charlie's body moved and swung.

Carlisle had seen him coming though and Charlie's rage only exploded as the Doctor merely rolled with the punch. An act which put him behind Charlie.

Suddenly a hand was on his neck and Charlie felt something slam into his spine, in an instant, Carlisle Cullen had him pinned to the ground with a crushing force and Charlie screamed.

Every alarm was going off in his head as Irina was off to the side yelling, "LET HIM GO HE DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS YOU!"

"You should have warned him!" Carlisle's voice was cold and nearly unfeeling and just as Charlie was about to make a valiant effort to buck the other man off he was filled with absolute calm.

Like being hit with extra strength NyQuil at the last second.

Carlisle moved then.

Charlie immediately pushed himself off the ground with such a force he was surprised that he flew to his feet instantly. Quickly he worked to locate Carlisle only to find the blond man standing next to one of his kids...

Jasper.

Irina was immediately by Charlie's side.

"Honestly Irina," Carlisle's tone was scolding as if he was in charge, and Irina was a little girl who'd been stupid,

"We had an agreement on how to do this."

"Don't talk to her like that!" Charlie snapped, unable to help it he took a step forwards, and suddenly Jasper was in front of Carlisle growling like a mad dog and the force of the boy, along with the sudden realization that he was scared up with bite marks which Charlie had never seen before... Causing something in his head to whisper that everyone who'd made them were dead...

It was enough to have Charlie backing up in sheer terror as ice filled his veins.

"Jasper enough!" Carlisle barked and the boy fell back, the Doctor suddenly sounded nearly defeated,

"Has everyone lost their minds?"

"You're 300 years too early to kill Carlisle, even if you are a Newborn," Jasper muttered and the words rang true to the point that Charlie had to remind himself that he'd known these people before.

Bella spent time at their house.

Yet they were strangers.

"Jasper, be polite. Bella will be angry if you're mean to her father, " Carlisle's tone implied a that Bella would find out and there was no way she wouldn't. Surprisingly the boy shut his mouth with a snap as the older man kept his golden eyes on Charlie.

It felt like Carlisle could see into Charlie's soul.

Was weighing it.

"I hope, dearly, that Irina has explained what we are, our diet, and your connection to her."

Not really knowing how to proceed, it was awkward as Irina just wrapped her arms around Charlie's own. So, the man grunted a bit, "Yeah."

"Good, then I can bring you news of Isabella," Carlisle broke out in a smile then as if the earlier attack and subsequent scolding of his son didn't happen,

"She is well of course, though she'll require rest for several days. There are no major injuries which will not be healed in a sparse few weeks.

"A concussion, leg strain, a minimal case of smoke inhalation. All in all she will be dancing again by Christmas."

"Dancing?" Charlie couldn't help the incredulous tone of his voice as the calm would not abate to matter how irritated he knew he should be by Carlisle being the bastard to bring news about his daughter.

"He doesn't know she likes to dance," Jasper whispered but it sounded like a realization more than a reminder.

And, in that moment, Charlie felt like even more of a stranger to Bella than ever.

The fact that he wasn't getting angry was enough to bother him, niggle at his brain, "What the hell is this? I should be mad at you.

"I had every intention of screaming down hell and demanding to know what made you think dragging my daughter into this was a good idea!

"Two seconds ago I wanted to rip your head off."

And yet he was still calm.

"That is Jasper," Carlisle informed him succinctly, as if it was no real matter,

"Some of us are granted Gifts when we enter immortality and Jasper is an empath who is also capable of sharing emotions.

"That is his calm."

Charlie grit his teeth as he accepted it because really, what else could he do with all, "Stop it."

"No," Jasper replied stubbornly but with a startling amount of power, "You're about one bad sentence away from trying to kill Carlisle again, and trust me, you will not last more than 2 seconds.

"So, it's either I keep you calm, or we tear your head off."

Carlisle simply slid his hands into his pockets patiently as if he trusted that. The gesture along with everything else, was enough for Charlie to as well.

"Are you going to tell me what the hell your planning to do with my daughter?"

"At the risk of sounding crass, I will inform you that Vampires generally only tend to have 2 interest in Humans," Carlisle's tone was even, but matter of fact, as if he was teaching a class or informing Charlie that he only had to start exercising and he'd get back to health in no time at all,

"To Drink them or they have Bonded and wish to become Mates."

Charlie closed his eyes as he felt a bit stupid for not making the connection. Perhaps that was what he did though, tricked himself into being stupid so he wouldn't have to accept the truth.

"Isabella is my Mate and I have waited a very long time to find her," Carlisle confirmed, clearly so there could be no doubt and Charlie would not be able to misconstrue the conversation later,

"Say whatever you wish regarding our union but I have decided not to care what anyone may say. Call it selfish, I will not blame you."

"He says you're 300," Charlie swallowed and wished he could get angry but the calm was smothering him,

"What right do you have?! She's 18!"

"Irina is over 1000, you're only 43."

"I'm a grown man!"

Silence reined over them and Charlie truly thought he'd won, until Carlisle pulled his hands from his pockets only to place them on his hips. Level was the stare the Doctor gave, Charlie could see in it something old ancient and nearly impossible to measure,

"What does age matter? Irina was frozen at 24. You are 40. To every Human you meet you will be the one they judge.

"Eventually Isabella's apparent age will match my own and no one will look twice at us."

Oh.

Oh how that burned something inside of him only for it to be smothered by Jasper yet again.

"That doesn't change the truth!" Charlie tried to pour his remembered outrage into it but couldn't manage against the onslaught of the boy's strange powers, so instead the words came out nearly helpless,

"That she's only a child and you're older than anyone has any right to be!"

"You are correct," Carlisle nodded slowly as if accepting Charlie's words but instead of backing down he dug his proverbial heels into the ground,

"It does not change the truth and that is this: I love her. I have waited 363 years simply hoping to find her and now I have.

"363 years. Why would I hold back at the last moment for something so arbitrary as age?

"Would that not be crueler? For her to have loved me from afar and never known? Never-"

Carlisle cut himself off and said nothing more. Jasper next to him ducked his head and Even Irina appeared slightly shocked by the words as if Carlisle had said something- Done something unusual or strange.

Irina was right though.

Charlie couldn't wrap his head around the twisted logic Carlisle was spewing.

"Yes. I would have been better because little girls get crushes everyday!"

"This is not a crush," the fire in Carlisle's voice was shocking, he was not angry but Charlie had never seen the man passionate. Even that night in the house Carlisle had stood there impassive as if it was all just motions he needed to go through. Song and dance to appease Bella's father.

That version of him appeared again, chilly and close to unfeeling, "We've gotten off track already though. You cannot stay in Isabella's cottage.

"The people of Forks must believe you are dead. So, tonight Eleazar will arrive and my family will join him in escorting you up to Alaska."

"Why Alaska?" Charlie pressed because, as much as he loathed to agree, Carlisle was right If he was going to talk to the man about Bella he didn't want Irina and Jasper there. They were strangers and didn't need to hear it.

"That is where my family keeps a home, it's miles from people so you will be safe," Irina revealed and Charlie realized that he was going to be taken to the place Bella had run off to.

That Bella had been alone in a house full of Vampires that not even Charlie knew, "You took my daughter to a house of Vampires?!

"Where she was trapped?! Miles from civilization?!"

Being calm was really starting to suck as the words once more were more broken and sputtered as Charlie wished he could. Just. Get. Mad.

"She was with me, that made her safe," Carlisle was clearly attempting to be reassuring but it did absolute nothing for Charlie's nerves as the other man steamrolled onward,

"Once again you are losing your focus. We will talk about Isabella more later, but currently there are more pressing matters."

"There is nothing more important than making sure my daughter is safe," Charlie replied and for once during the entire conversation he knew the icy calm was his own piled onto the artificial one.

Because that was ingrained in him.

It was innate and he knew he'd always come running if she ever called.

No matter the cost.

The intensity of the feeling nearly knocked him over but Charlie stayed on his feet.

"I agree," Carlisle offered a light smile, just a gentle tugging at the corners of his mouth,

"And she is safe. With her mother and Leah Clearwater."

That had to be enough for him.

It had to be.

Suddenly Charlie's mind rewound to the words _'Isabella's Cottage'._

"Why does Bella have a cottage?"

"This is gonna take forever," Jasper groaned as if Charlie was the one whose fault this all was.

"It was simply a precaution," Carlisle replied, hedging his words a little too much before simply confessing,

"We were not sure how disapproving you would be and having her stay in the house would have been too dangerous because of Edward and Jasper's unsure control due to the fact that her blood is particularly... Appealing ."

And God.

Yeah.

He really hated being forced to stay calm.

Charlie took another swing anyway and seeing Carlisle's perfect face crack was worth it.

Sure it was a cheap shot, and a bit less powerful than it could have been had rage been present, but it was satisfying nevertheless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You shoulda just said it was for privacy Carlisle JFC.


	3. November-Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The thing about going crazy, is that people who are actually crazy don't think they are.

Of course, Charlie's actions weren't without consequences as Jasper and Irina both seemed to immediately lay a firm hold of each of his arms before rushing in him into the cottage. As Carlisle righted himself from the rather wild and messy strike, their eyes met.

And Charlie got the distinct feeling that it was not the Doctor they were protecting.

In the end Jasper said nothing as he removed himself from the cottage and while Charlie was trying to get his mind back in order from the tumult of the day he'd experienced so far, Irina sighed. Releasing his arm the woman sort of began adjusting her hair as if agitated.

After pulling it all up into a rather messy bun at the pace of what seemed like a sloth, Irina turned her gold eyes to him,

"Let's see if we can sit you down on the couch without breaking it. I know Bella probably won't say anything if you do, but Esme said it was the last one at the warehouse and it won't be coming back next year."

That.

Was a lot of pressure as Charlie turned his attention on the couch in question. It was a nice deep spruce, but the design of the thing screamed expensive. It had rather lovely redwood carvings which weren't too detailed, but tasteful. Everything about it announced that it was probably the fanciest couch that Charlie would ever sit on.

From the golden thread stitching all the way to the way it smelled of fresh new polish.

"Where are we?" Charlie needed to know. His brain was climbing the walls of the place and he was about one wrong move away from following it as he tried not to panic because he could hear Jasper still outside, skimming the edges of the forest in some sort of patrol pattern.

Carlisle had left completely and Charlie felt a bit calmer knowing that, he was also relieved to find that the sensation of that particular emotion wasn't so oppressing.

"We're actually down a path just out of sensory range of the main house. If we walked about a few yards that way," Irina pointed to the left, the same direction which Carlisle had fled in,

"You'd start hearing the Cullens milling about in the house, let's get you sitting though. We have a few hours before my Coven comes to retrieve us. "

"Should I.. rest or something? I mean if we're traveling at night," was what his mouth said, but Charlie was really needing to know why the hell she was so determined to get him on the couch. Especially when it was so clearly worth close to half of what his mortgage payment used to be.

"We don't sleep," Irina replied brightly, "Now let's sit!"

The woman rather casually ambled over to the couch and sat down with clear ease, tossing her arm over the back of it as she nestled herself in the corner in order to face him with a grin,

"Your turn."

"This is Bella's couch," he rather dumbly replied as his brain was still stalled on the fact that he'd never sleep again. No more dreams or drowsiness. Charlie could feel his lungs refusing to move and somewhere he registered that he hadn't actually been breathing until he needed to talk or smell something and mentally, he shuddered.

"Yep."

"That Cullen bought."

It was to her credit that Irina just kept smiling as if he was the most interesting thing in the world, as she tilted her head at him,

"I really don't want to talk about Carlisle right now. Not when it upsets you so much."

Which was fair but his mind wouldn't let it go. It just wouldn't.

Suddenly the reason hit him.

Bella had lied to him to try and make things more acceptable.

She said it started when she was 18 but that wasn't true.

"Oh God they've been seeing each other since- Since- The Hiking trip was their first date!" Charlie couldn't help it as he grabbed his own hair frantically while his new point of view made the frantic nerves he was feeling build.

He wished he'd hit the bastard harder.

"Charlie please," Irina pat the seat of the couch and her rather easy display was beginning to tighten,

"Just sit down. I'll explain Vampire Courting to you, how we're going to do it and how Carlisle did it too, because there's no way he didn't do it right."

Something like fire ants marching across his flesh, taking a bite with every stomp, it began to cover his arms and spine as Charlie grit his teeth. He didn't want to know.

He didn't.

It was bad enough that... That Carlisle had sunk his claws into Bella in the middle of the Emergency Room. Because that's where it had happened. There was no doubt in him.

Carlisle had come at Bella, practically chomping at the bit, frothing at the mouth for a 17 year old girl! What would have happened if Charlie hadn't been there?!

Without warning Charlie felt his chest tense as his lungs began to vibrate and, without him even meaning to, the man realized he was growling while clenching his jaw tightly. Venom foaming between his teeth as he couldn't stop his brain from spiraling to all the things he'd missed because he hadn't known.

"Charlie, focus on me," Irina's soothing voice fell over him like morning dew as she arrived at his side, her scent filling his nostrils and calming his raging mind,

"Please."

It was difficult but Charlie managed to claw his thoughts from the frantic haze as he focused on the aroma of rain and snow. Then the piece of sky inside him grew bright

This wasn't the time to ask about Bella. Only Carlisle could give those answers and maybe Bella herself. Irina was offering what she could. That was all he could hope for with Carlisle having left and Charlie not being able to stand the sight of the man.

"Let's sit on the couch," Irina insisted one more time and Charlie gnashed his teeth,

"Why?! Why do I need to sit down?!"

Yelling suddenly felt awful. He'd never used to yell and now he felt like he was fighting to just keep his voice even now that the burning wasn't so harsh. Here he was, yelling at a woman who had only just been helpful and kind to him.

He'd been taught since he was a boy not to yell, it was rude and never got anything done with the exception of upsetting other people.

Irina simply gazed at him a bit evenly, her bright attitude clearly a forced as she swallowed and informed him,

"Because, learning to control your strength is a priority. It would be bad to break the house when you get there and Tanya isn't as forgiving as Bella."

Charlie realized that Irina did know Bella, even slightly as his daughter had spent a week with this woman's family. Bella who'd already left the impression of never getting angry and being kind.

He wanted so much to be proud but his heart was aching in the place where it refused to beat, all while the man clenched his fist while anger at Carlisle stealing Bella away resurfaced.

"So please. Try to sit."

It was the fourth time she'd asked, Charlie hadn't been counting but he knew it the moment he'd wondered slightly. He figured then he owed it to Irina to sit on the damn couch. Walking over Charlie sort of crashed into the low coffee table and caused the wood to crack a bit,

"Pine... That was made of pine."

Irina simply smiled at him encouragingly, "Try and go slower."

Charlie obeyed more than a little cautiously, as he very carefully sat down on the couch with only a light creak which had him slowing down even more. Finally, he was sitting and Irina choked out a laugh.

"Relax."

He didn't feel tense, be the man suddenly caught sight of himself in the television screen and was jarred. Firstly, Irina was correct, his posture was ridiculously stiff. Secondly, Charlie realized he didn't just feel different.

No.

He looked different.

The color was off from the Television's black screen but he could see his own face perfectly reflected back and it was...

Wrong.

Immediately a hand went up to his own cheek as he poked himself to make sure he wasn't losing his mind completely...

At least, even more than he had been.

"That's not me."

"It is," Irina insisted and Charlie turned to her and knew, just knew his expression was the furthest from polite it had been since he'd woken up.

Because the reflection held a stranger he barely recognized. It was.. Maybe some version of Charles Swan, the one from a separate sci-fi universe that played foot ball in high school, then dated Lynda Conroy before getting voted prom king in his senor year.

That was not him.

Not the Charlie who got a job at a pizza joint during high school and couldn't even look at a girl until he was 18, then kept flubbing it until he was a junior beat officer falling too hard too fast for a girl who'd break his heart just a couple years later because she didn't understand responsibility he'd been given.

That he was the only person his parents could rely on because both of them were _dying_.

"The transformation isn't just painful because it transforms our bodies to a crystalline structure. It also changes our bone structure to the optimum outcome of our DNA," Irina's words were gentle and soft, but regaining her enthusiasm,

"Your face is perfectly symmetrical now, I've known women who's noses have gotten bigger or smaller depending on the region of the world they're from."

Charlie turned his attention back to his reflection, "I need a mirror."

Irina obliged and he was even more... Freaked out when she came back with a floor length mirror as big as her. Charlie could see himself clearly then, without obstruction and it was like looking at a version of him which had been altered to be suitable for viewing in a fashion magazine.

It made him wonder what Irina originally looked like.

He'd likely never know.

Silence passed as he stared at himself. The slight graying that had been edging in had grown more silver and turned into a more distinguished accent than a spattering. His jaw was a bit sharper and Charlie found himself tilting his head as he realized his forehead was ever so slightly smaller, not so wide.

While his eyes were...

They were a bit more round, innocently childish, like Bella's.

Only his were red. The very same shade of the blood which had gushed from the bear he'd encountered.

"Why are your eyes gold?"

Propping the mirror against the low table just so, Irina plopped herself back down on the couch but rather boldly tucked herself next to him, "Yours will be too, eventually. Most Vampires keep their red eyes but we Animal Drinkers can identify one another by our golden eyes."

Charlie was surprised that having her tucked into him like that didn't rankle, he'd never really liked physical contact when it wasn't from someone he loved but Irina just slotted herself there, like she belonged.

"Tell me about courtship... or whatever."

Irina beamed brightly.

Having her weight against him did worlds to keep those marching ants at bay while Irina explained how courtship worked. The customs.

At first, Charlie was focused on learning more about what Carlisle had been getting up to with Bella right under his nose, but as Irina continued on longer and longer he began to wonder if this was what she really wanted.

With him.

For Charlie to go up and live with her family, get to know them, find a place with them before he could even do more than just hold her hand.

And wasn't that assuring? That Charlie couldn't even kiss her until her entire coven told him he'd passed muster.

"Most covens have it easy," Irina informed him brightly as he tried to process everything she was explaining to him, "Vampires never travel in groups bigger than 3 or 4, at most, and those tend to be split bonds or two mated pairs."

"Why no bigger than that? I mean, the Cullens seem to be doing fine..."

"Food. Human blood isn't exactly easy to hunt down when you're trying not to get noticed by society at large, then there's in fighting as blood can get scarce and feeding tends to cloud everything save for the connection," she explained and wasn't that a bit horrifying and also slightly impressive that the Cullens were 6 Vampires living like a family unnoticed,

"Our families are only able to get so big is because we don't have to compete for food. Animals are abundant and no one's going to report a missing bear or elk."

She then told him of the laws.

Why Bella had to keep the secret from him.

The horrors of immortal children, that her mother Sasha had created one, a little boy named Visilli and she'd died for her crimes.

About Tanya and Esme, Eleazar, Carmen, as well as Kate.

Her family which she wanted him to be part of.

Everything was moving too fast. Charlie didn't know if he could keep up, even at the speeds he was capable of going now.

Eventually he got anxious from sitting too long and Irina took him for another jaunt in the forest. A game of tree hopping to get his instincts calmed. Charlie noted that Jasper was trailing them the whole time.

When he was finally calm as he could be expected to get under the circumstances, dusk had fallen and it was time to be on their way.

* * *

There was something about the situation which had Charlie's skin feeling too tight for his body, gritting his teeth he tried his damnedest to pay attention to Carlisle introducing Esme, Eleazar, and Carmen.

It wasn't just the three newcomers which were bothering him though, perhaps it was the fact that Irina was once again silent as the Doctor did all the talking. Even though the trio were her family. Maybe it was even from having the Cullens hovering around him like Charlie was about to bolt into the night.

Whatever it was, the man found he was gnashing his teeth as he tried his best to keep himself from vibrating with the force of his malcontent.

Especially when the introductions were completed and Esme bounded over to Carlisle eagerly only for the two to hug rather exuberantly as the man kissed her cheek.

"Thank you so much for this, I know it must be a tad awkward" Esme smiled a little demurely and something in Charlie was beginning to go wild as the woman, who was so beautiful she had practically walked right from as story book, didn't even fully pull away from the blond man.

"You know there is very little I would not do for your family," Carlisle replied and Charlie surprisingly found his chest close to rumbling as it had earlier.

No.

It started up without his permission as Irina ran a hand up his back as if confused about his discomfort and Charlie couldn't help.

He wasn't getting it either.

Charlie was beginning to think it was a combination at what ease Carlisle acted like nothing was wrong as well as the fact that the Doctor was even able to look him in the eye shamelessly. Not even a splash of contrition or apology over what had occurred.

"Right, as if this is about Irina," Esme rolled her eyes, but it appeared to be good natured teasing as the woman finally released the Doctor which had Carlisle smiling as if he'd just heard the cutest joke in the world.

That only pissed Charlie off more.

"It seems our new friend is getting restless," Eleazar observed lightly, shooting a rather assessing glance to Charlie himself. An action which didn't help his discomfort and had Charlie shuffling on his feet so that he wouldn't begin bouncing on his heels. The restlessness was returning in full form.

"I thought we were waiting on Edward and Rosalie," Carmen observed, confusion coated her words and yeah, Charlie hadn't really noticed they were gone but he was mostly trying to just keep his focus on everything else.

Eyes flickering around, he couldn't understand the creeping paranoia as his brain was screaming to keep an eye on everyone.

"They will be staying behind as Isabella's guard," Carlisle revealed rather easily, his tone was calm and Charlie found it just a bit too blase for his taste as the blond man continued,

"It will only be us making this journey."

"Hell yeah," Emmett cheered a bit too exuberantly because it raised Charlie's hackles a little higher as the rumble in his chest deepened further against his own volition. The burly boy didn't seem to care though,

"This is going to be awesome! You think we'll run into any campers?"

"I say at least two or three, it's cold as the devil right now though so who can say?" Jasper spoke up his tone severe but edging on mocking, which had Charlie realizing exactly what they were talking about. It was chilling and the moment was made even worse as Carlisle snapped his eyes on the boys and very serenely informed them,

"Both of you. Be kind, Bella won't find your jeering amusing when it's so cruelly related to her father."

As if she'd actually find out, as if it wasn't in question she'd be told the details of this journey, Emmett sighed, "C'mon she'd think it was funny if it was about her!"

"No, she wouldn't," Jasper nudged the bigger boy and Charlie knew he was going insane because the blond boy continued,

"She only thinks people dying is funny when they deserve it. Like how I told her I never had a grandpa before cause his slave killed him with a shovel."

Emmett guffawed heartily and Charlie couldn't help but stare uneasily as even Alice smiled as if it was hilarious. Jasper clearly saw the man's discomfort at the violent story though because the Vampire offered a light grin, and informed him as if it should be reassuring,

"Don't worry. He didn't get in trouble for it, I actually met him when I was older and he ended up working as a cowhand in the western territories."

Completely ignoring them as if they hadn't just said something utterly horrifying on several levels, Carlisle turned his attention back to Esme,

"Alright, you make the call. We're headed your way and I won't presume to tell you how to handle your newest member."

Charlie made a valiant effort to focus on Irina as Carlisle and Eleazar were assigned at the rear while Esme and Emmett took the front. At their right Alice and Jasper , to the left Carmen positioned herself alongside Irina.

He couldn't help but think they all must look like some sort of sadistic bumper car with Charlie in the middle and Irina keeping close enough to him that he wasn't going to flip around in order to attempt another go at Carlisle without her being able to tackle him. Or something else as equally tempting.

Later, just after crossing the border into Alaska, Charlie would realize they were all positioned optimally to be capable of forming a veritable dog pile should things turn south. Fortunately when he did catch scent of people, and his brain shoved him once more into the backseat, their sizable entourage proved capable of dragging Charlie safely away from the most amazing smell he'd ever encountered.

It was the sweetest most alluring aroma he'd ever experienced as the sweet succulent flavor of the drink coated his mouth and lungs before he went mad with it. The only thing Charlie could see was the destination and all he could feel was the absolute barren thirst to have it for himself as he screamed and growled in a frenzy in an attempt to run towards it. All while a veritable horde of Vampires attempted to throw him down to the ground like the world's most violent game of foot ball.

During that fiasco Charlie learned they could reattached their arms. And wasn't all that nearly enough to have him screaming that he was just done? He wanted off this goddamned sick twisted ride? To have his own ripped off by Jasper only for Emmett to hand it back laughingly, as if it was a big joke,

"At least it wasn't your head. Carlisle had to do that to me a few times when I was a Newborn and let me tell you it was not fun!"

In the end Charlie did little talking, with the crowd he felt as if his mind was just a jumble of anxiety. The man could barely focus on anything but Irina and the journey ahead.

All the words zooming around him might as well have been radio chatter for all he could focus and take it in. As if the smell of everyone else diminished Irina's comforting hold on him.

By the time they reached the Denali's territory, Charlie felt like his skin was about to explode and was relieved as Carlisle called out,

"Alright, this appears to be the end of the line for us."

At first, Charlie had no idea what that meant but, suddenly, two blonde women who shared a startling resemblance to Irina arrived in the thick dark woods. He'd heard rustling out a ways but he hadn't thought it was Vampires. Maybe animals rushing about? Then again he should have known better with the lack of blood and heart beats they all seemed to possesses.

To have them appear was startling, doing nothing for his already frantic state.

"This is Kate and Tanya," Esme informed him easily, at their name being said the woman who owned it waved casually, as Irina very excitedly shook Charlie's arm before informing him,

"They are my sisters."

Charlie jolted then as the Cullens very quickly began rallying around Carlisle as if he was the one being escorted only for Tayna, the shorter of the two new blonds to call out,

"We thank you for your assistance Carlisle. Go home, return to your Mate, she no doubt wishes to hear word of her father. Tell her we also hope to see her soon when she's recovered from this latest ordeal."

"All thanks should be laid at your feet," Carlisle replied smoothly and Charlie didn't really like that the other man was smiling so brightly as the Doctor ducked his head,

"Isabella will be glad to know her father is in such good hands, and no doubt she will also thank you for your well wishes."

Maybe he didn't like it because nobody seemed to be talking to him and if they tried Charlie would only keep growling as he had been nearly the entire way up. As if speech was beyond him and his frantic anxious state at being so completely surrounded by people he didn't trust.

It was a helplessness being a slave to his body trapped in a feral mind which he could only pull himself out of when he was alone with Irina and feeling safe. Realizing how lost he was to this new form of life was excruciating. How could they do it?!

How could all of them just run around together and act like nothing was wrong?!

Each Cullen bid the Denali Vampires a warm goodbye and when the conga line got to Charlie the goodbyes were just simple nods. Though Carlisle did offer a hand which Charlie only continued to growl about as the other man simply proceeded to wish him well before handing Irina a cellphone saying,

"Make sure he's consistent in his control before handing that over. It has all the necessary numbers in it."

Charlie wondered what the hell that meant because as far as he knew everyone but Bella thought he was dead as a goddamned door nail and was't that something he'd have to think on later because it was becoming too much again.

Emmett too gave a bit of an odd goodbye as he wiggled his eyebrows and declared, "See you at Christmas Gramps! Hopefully you can talk by then!"

And, quicker than the Human eye could track, the Cullens were trekking back towards Washington before Irina was tugging Charlie onward as Tanya took Carlisle's place at the rear and Kate replaced Jasper and Alice.

It took him a while, but as they reached the densest of snowy alpine forest, Charlie realized that he wasn't cold. Hadn't been the entire run, which had taken all night and most of the early morning.

Another alien thing.

"Don't worry, you'll feel safer once we get you settled at home, you'll be able to build up your scent in my room," Irina was practically cheering as she informed him of her plans,

"We'll make a den where you can go to calm down and collect yourself."

Having a place he could be calm and settle sounded nice, but Charlie still couldn't picture it past the visceral panic which seemed to be building in him with every step he made away from the place that the Cullens had departed from them. Sure, he hated Carlisle's guts at the moment, but he sort of respected the guy once and knew him a little.

Charlie didn't know anyone now.

Irina was a stranger and as much as that clear airy expanse longed to know her, he didn't.

Everyone was acting like this was normal and maybe it was for them.

But this wasn't Charlie's world.

Everything happening just kept piling up and getting further and further from his understanding of the rock they all stood on which hurdled through space at impossible speeds around the sun.

He just kept getting swept up in the undertow while everyone tossed him around like a pathetically gruesome game of hot potato.

Getting used to this life.

Seemed impossible.


	4. December

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stability is Key when making huge life changes

Most of November was spent the same way.

Charlie had holed himself up in the room which smelled of Irina that the woman herself had sequestered him into the moment they arrived in Alaska. The only interaction he was really capable of could only be carried out while he was in that room.

It was becoming increasingly clear that the only reason he'd been able to hold that rather volatile conversation with Carlisle was because of Jasper's artificial clam.

During his weeks in self isolation, Charlie began to subtly get to know the Vampires of Denali from the conversations he was picking up as they all milled about at went through their daily routines. The only times Charlie left the room was to hunt with Irina and Tanya, or Esme... One or the both of them as he quickly discovered that the two women were in charge of him.

In charge of the entire Coven.

What he gleaned from the time he spent in that room was this:

Tanya and Esme were Mated. Tanya was a bit of a fire cracker while Esme seemed so sweet she could give sugar a run for it's money.

Eleazar and Carmen were also a pair but they were more sedate than the other two. Preferring to spend time doing things Charlie couldn't fathom because it was spent with minimal chatter about places and things that his mind was unable to pin point or identify. It was likely they were doing research about art or history.

Kate was someone he had a hard time getting a read on during that duration which he spent in the room because she tended to spend a lot of her time outside or pestering Irina to come out and stop being boring when the woman had decided to sit with Charlie for company.

He broke a lot of things during those days and Irina just bore it. Eleazar kept delivering fresh washed clothes because Charlie kept tearing his own, then kept tearing through the other man's when he hunted.

In December things changed.

Slowly, Charlie felt a bit less like frantically tearing through the room and scrunching himself in the corner of said 4 walls. Irina arrived home from a hunt on December 6th, swung the door opened and declared,

"Happy Birthday! You're officially a month old! Eleazar hopes you'll be up to joining us in the living room."

Charlie stared at her while his mind provided the images of the living room he'd seen hist first time coming into the home. Since then all his comings and goings were through the bedroom window in order to minimize the damage he'd do.

But he hand't broken anything in a week and the last time he went hunting he hand't gotten his clothes ruined so Charlie slowly stood up and was startled to find the idea of leaving his small sanctum didn't feel as immensely terrifying as it used to.

"A month," he sighed out as he did his best to walk slowly towards Irina, hoping and praying that the moment he caught someone else's scent his body wouldn't revert to the speechless hissing mess he tended to now. All he'd ever been able to do was communicate his thirst or discomfort and he was beginning to feel like an Island with only Irina for company.

"Yeah, it's December," she assured him, offering her hand and he made sure to take it gently as he'd once grabbed it to hard and caused her delicate fingers to crack. It had been the most horrifying thing he'd ever done and Charlie quickly learned to be gently, hold back.

Their finger linked together as the woman led him out of the room. The lodge was not as comfortably decorated as the cottage had been. Bella's Cottage had been. This place had a bit more flair and oomph and Charlie would never say it, but he preferred Bella's tastes to whoever had designed the interior here in Alaska.

Making their way across the hall which over looked the living room almost like a loft, Charlie caught sight of Eleazar at the top of the stares and the other man's scent wafted over him in an instant.

Startlingly, he found he did not growl. He only grew uncomfortable with the fact that there was another male so close.

"You know, you're doing remarkably for having no siblings from the same Sire in residence," Eleazar observed and Charlie didn't feel like he deserved the obvious compliment even if he didn't' quite understand what it meant.

Realizing his throat and chest were not rumbling, the man dared it, "I don't know what that means."

Eleazar beamed like it was already Christmas, "I simply mean that ... Say if Carlisle had been the one to Bite you, having Esme here would have quickened the process of your adjustment.

"After all, his Venom would have made you siblings of a sort, and the two of you would share a few scent notes. Alas, you are among strangers and you have already proved yourself capable of speech after only a month."

Once again, Charlie didn't feel very accomplished but he allowed Irina to bring him forwards as Eleazar led the way down stairs into the wide opened living room. There was a rather vibrant mix of smells in the house, one which had made him frantic when he originally entered but at the moment he found himself more able to take them all in. Start attempting to separate them.

Something said a couple of them belonged separated.

"Look at you," Esme called out brightly from her place across the living room, Charlie had heard her of course, but seeing the woman again was a bit odd without the haze of nervous energy being so prominent,

"I'm happy to see you out and about already!"

Esme cupped her hands in front of her as if she'd wanted to clap but thought better of making such a noise before letting her linked hands fall in front of her,

"How are you feeling Charlie?"

"Nervous."

Esme was practically oozing excitement then as she shared a glance with Eleazar. Tanya was heard then as she made her way out of the wood work, linked her arm with Esme's and rather exuberantly declared,

"Is that you Chief? Thought you'd never get out of that den of yours. How's it feel?"

That...

Charlie smiled at that declaration feeling his nerves ease a bit more as Tanya's joking manner reminded him a bit of Harry and Billy's rather irreverent demeanor when it came to the three of them.

"Good," he found it wasn't too far off the mark to finally be feeling in control even if it was in the passenger seat with one hand on the wheel while some creature was flooring it and fighting the whole way.

"Carmen and Kate are in the Village," Eleazar informed him, very easily, gently, the man's demeanor reminded him of what Charlie used to think of Carlisle before everything went..

He shoved the thought away as he focused back on Eleazar,

"I was hoping to get a moment with you, I have Gift which can glean and gather information on other Vampire's Gifts.

"Edward claimed his telepathy could never get a clear reading on you, and I have found that when I first touched you during our journey home, I could not either. So, with your permission I would like to have a bit of a more thorough inspection."

"Depends on what that means," Charlie swallowed hard so that he didn't just run back to the room at the thought of someone 'inspecting' him. He could already feel the ants begin marching on his flesh which wasn't really flesh anymore... It would only be a matter of time before they began biting down.

"He'll only just shake your hand," Irina whispered soothingly as she stroked Charlie's arm in comfort. With the way she said it, really it didn't' sound so bad...

"Alright...."

Charlie did his best not to breathe or move as he focused entirely on the place where Irina was holding his hand while he lifted his free arm out towards Eleazar. The other man stepped forwards slowly, cautiously, clearly aware of his discomfort before cupping their hands together.

It was less of a handshake, falling short of a caress, more of a quick grab and squeeze before Eleazar was once more to himself. Only now he appeared thoughtful.

"It's must be passive then. Something you have to turn on or else it would have been very bad news for us when we were escorting you," the Vampire mused, his golden eyes nearly shining,

"You do indeed have a gift... It's appears to be a form of sensory alteration wherein you slow down a target's faculties. I'm unsure on the details... I could barely get my own gift past the initial layer of it you have around your mind..."

"I don't understand," Charlie was happy to be feeling confusion rather than chronic jitters he'd been cursed with.

"People... are easy to read for you correct? They tend to slip up more around you and play their hands quicker. I'm going to tell you something which might be surprising to hear. You see, their defenses do not fall, they are completely unable to put them up fast enough. You slow down their ability to register a need to lie or protect themselves," Eleazar smiled and it was nearly sly,

"Edward could not read your mind because his own mind was slowed when he attempted to, and he was unable to slog through your barrier to the meat of your thoughts.

"I'd love to see you in action but you would have to learn to push your power beyond it's simple passive state which it currently resides in for me to learn more."

Irina was beginning to make a rather strange high pitch noise in the back of her throat and when Charlie's chest brightened with a ray of sun he realized she was excited, thrilled to hear the news. He himself could only get caught up in her joy as he couldn't even begin to understand how to go about stretching something he'd never even known he possessed. Like a muscle he'd only just grown...

No.

One he'd never used and now needed to make strong.

That's how the first half of December was spent.

Getting accustomed to the scent of the house, and his new Coven while Eleazar took him out on the ice and snow and began his lessons.

Irina sat on the sidelines in the snow looking on in childlike wonder and Charlie wondered at the woman who had been like a calm pillar through his November. Content with his silence as she went on and on about her family and her day. He listened and was content to just let her calm tones wash over him as the days passed and his mind was slowly reclaimed.

She was like Renee.

No.

That was wrong.

Renee had never had the grace or ability to sit still when she needed to, had never been mature enough to know when that was.

Charlie's heart felt like it was about to beat again as he realized what that meant in the broad scope of things. So overwhelming was realization of it near enough to brought him to his knees.

But it didn't, because Eleazar was staring him down and informing him, "You must visualize your gift, your mental self, and reach beyond your mind to me.

"Or, it may not be malleable and perhaps it will only stretch around you. Push out, force it beyond you and discover the shape it takes."

Which was why Charlie couldn't dwell on that observation, as he forced his hectic mind to focus on the other man's instructions. All the while Eleazar practically skipped high speeds circle's around him, clearly volunteering himself as the test subject to whatever Charlie was secretly capable of.

On their first session out, Charlie didn't manage it at all. He could still hardly focus on one thing, but Eleazar was calm and practically radiated comfort and patience to the point that Charlie realized that the man had done this a lot. Probably enough so that he'd mastered the art of training frantic minds like his own to focus.

Because on December 11th, not even a full week after that first day out of the room, Charlie managed to slow Eleazar down.

It was like having a balloon crafted from hard plastic around his brain and attempting to fill it with maple syrup in an attempt to get the thing inflated. The first time Charlie actually felt the..whatever it was, had been a bit uncanny.

As it was like being able to reach a part of himself which was normally forbidden.

Though, when he finally managed to expand it out, the experience was terrifying, magnificent, as well as awe inducing all at once. Charlie couldn't help but grit his teeth with his struggle as he found the other Vampire stuck going at what almost seemed like slow motion.

A voice in his head informed him it wasn't quite that.

After only a few seconds the balloon shattered and his brain sort of felt woozy before it righted itself once again, as if the original thing had reformed around his brain inside Charlie's skull.

"That was magnificent!" Eleazar cheered brightly as if it hadn't only been shorter than a moment,

"It felt almost as if I was being forced to trudge through molasses. The air was nearly thick but there was no actual gas or substance emitting from you so it is clearly completely mental!

"What did it feel like for you?"

Folding over Charlie braced his hands on his knees and realized that if he were still human he'd be wheezing from the effort it had taken to expand for only that moment.

As it was his brain was feeling like sludge.

Unfortunately Irina was out at the village since he'd proven he could be trusted to talk when he was alone with the others.

"Filling up a hard plastic ball with maple syrup," Charlie huffed out and began to feel his throat burning with thirst. He wasn't supposed to be hunting every other day anymore.

Control.

Control Meant self-denial and to perfect it he could only hunt every week now that he was a month old.

Discipline was something he was used to, but food was a place he'd always indulged and Charlie would kill for a chuck steak and fries at the moment but he knew he'd be unable to keep it down. The food would do nothing for him at all.

He'd spent hours remembering that last breakfast Bella had made him before he'd dropped her off at school with Seth.

She had been trying to make him eat healthier too.. Charlie's brain recalled the phone that Irina had been given and he longed for it. Suddenly his train of thought was derailed as he was brought back to his lesson by Eleazar declaring,

"If it's a sphere it may have a limited emitter range, which is fine. We are not here to make you into a soldier, only to teach you all you need to be capable of controlling it so you may not lose control of it."

Even though he'd known, it as the lives the Vampires around him seemed to live were peaceful and even Cullen and his kids just milled about getting by living, still it was assuring to hear that Charlie was never really going to be expected to fight no matter what supernatural power he'd apparently be granted.

It was a testament to how difficult his first month had been on him mentally that he hadn't even flinched at the idea of it.

Somewhere he distantly wondered if this was the beginning of the mental shift Irina had told him about all those days ago.

Jolting suddenly, Charlie whipped his attention once more back on Eleazar as the man simply tossed himself onto the snowy ground,

"Let us take a break. You've done far better, much faster than I have expect you to."

He would have asked why, if his brain didn't feel like it was barely beginning to become something close to solid again so Charlie decided to allow himself to collapse onto the ground only about 5 feet from the other man. It was strange to feel his clothes become a tad wet but not feel the cold of the snow. He barely had on jeans and a t-shirt but Charlie felt as if he was fine, even thought there was a light snow fall adding a light new layer on the powdered ground. The smell of it was something very much like walking into a freezer at a gas station for a case of beer.

Another thing he was starting to miss.

"Tell me about your Bella," Eleazar suddenly prompted lightheartedly and Charlie frowned a bit at the words.

He really didn't know what to say to that as he stuck his entire hand into the snow to very weirdly find it unchanged or chilled by the action,

"You've met her. Irina says you and Carlisle are friends... What's there to say?"

It was far more bitter than he'd ever been before as part of Charlie realized that he didn't actually hate Carlisle. Perhaps when he was human he'd been so angry and raged against the betrayal that he'd thought hate was growing but every time he turned his mind toward the Doctor, it was no longer that burning inferno as it had been weeks ago.

Charlie was beginning to realize a few things.

His love for Bella felt like a bright shining star on the horizon, everything he was doing to gain control was so that he could see his precious girl again one day. To hold her and love her like he'd been trying to do all this time.

It felt almost overwhelming now.

The power of it.

Every time he thought on Bella it was like seeing her for the first time that fateful September he'd been blessed with fatherhood. No pain from Renee's leaving echoed and nothing could ever taint that precious light in him.

Inhuman.

He loved her so much it was inhuman.

So thinking of her, then thinking of Carlisle... Charlie could only feel something he couldn't yet understand.

It wasn't anything like acceptance. More... More confusion.

With Irina he was beginning to see why his heart had apparently answered her own call. The woman was joyful like a summer sky stretching out endlessly. Charlie had always liked women who had a brightness to them that he simply lacked.

But Irina also possessed a weight to her...

Substantial character that made the woman capable of patience. As if she knew what it was like to carry people and it hadn't dimmed with the thousand of years she'd walked with it.

So what was it about Bella?

What made her so perfect for Carlisle Cullen, Vampire Doctor and father of 5? Why him? What could he possibly need from her?!

"I only had the chance to experience her company for a week," Eleazar confessed a bit, as if he was sharing a secret,

"Most of her time was spent with Carlisle himself, though the ladies stole her away any chance they could get.

"Even then any time which was not spent with her Mate, Bella was reconnecting with Alice and Jasper. Besides! A father's view is much different from a lovers! And Carlisle speaks little on her save for when he waxes poetic about her finer qualities."

That.

That did nothing to make Charlie feel alright about the whole thing,"Tell me what you think of her first."

Eleazar let out a laugh, it wasn't angry or incredulous, but almost as if he truly found the words entertaining,

"Alright! I'll play your game my new friend! I have found your daughter to be something very special.

"Though I've always know the woman that Mated to Carlisle would need to be, Bella blew all my expectations out of the water. She is like a mighty pillar in The Great Colosseum, not only powerful in her ability to shoulder the weight of the complex but beautifully crafted in her delicate understanding which very graciously extends to our Kind.

"She passes no judgement swiftly and has a heart which could likely contain whole universes if one was privileged a peer into it. Yet, she is mysterious! None of us could ever determine what Bella ever truly thought or felt regarding anything at all besides what she shared.

"Which wasn't much! Only that she loves you dearly and was crying for how she hurt you when she arrived here."

Like a steel spike through the heart.

That was what those final words felt like. To realize that Bella's regrets to leave had been formed on her way to escape. Charlie wished he could have known that, or that she'd have returned sooner and not stayed the whole damn week so he'd at least have figured it out.

"Bella's like a lighthouse on a bright summer day," Charlie finally replied, he pulled his hand from the snow and watched the ice which had clung to him as it refused to melt,

"Nobody cares to notice it until they're too close to the cliffs and need something from it."

Eleazar seemed to stare at the frozen crystals on Charlie's hand too before asking, "And in this illustration, who are you?"

That was...

Thinking deeper on it was strange. Charlie wasn't a sailor, there was never a time he relied on the lighthouse or leaned on it for support. He was always the one making sure other people didn't ram into it when it was stormy...

He wasn't the person who lit it up either. That was Bella too. She was her own strength and relied on herself so much it was frustrating.

Who was he in this illustration?

"I don't know," Charlie sighed a bit, "Maybe it's a bad illustration."

"Or perhaps your simply the person who built it and watches the beauty of it wishing someone else would too," Eleazar offered simply and Charlie wondered at the man's apparent wisdom.

It was like talking to his grandfather and staring at a face that was younger than Charlie himself. But Eleazar was over 1000 and it really truly shone in that moment.

"Maybe."

They sat in quiet for a beat as Charlie worked up the courage to ask what his mind had snagged on, "Why would she need to be special? The one Mated to Carlisle?"

Eleazar looked at Charlie like he was silly, or perhaps a dumb kid as the Vampire with topaz eyes sighed,

"Carlisle is the best of us. He has never fed on Humans and his compassion is so great he's never intended to ever do so.

"He's a man without equal, his self control is legendary throughout our kind. You know those who follow our lifestyle, though few, follow him as an example. Carlisle is the kind of man who never falters, never breaks. Performs surgery daily without flinching at the blood when a paper cut would have most of us panicking.

"Even Edward, who can read his mind, views him as the best of men. Really, who can live up to that? Who could deserve the love of a man without peer? Your Bella is very lucky. She'll be breaking more than a few hearts in Italy when they learn the _Stregoni Benefici_ has found his love."

Charlie said nothing because what could he say?

It was almost like Eleazar saw Carlisle as some sort of Demi-God.

That was enough to terrify him that Bella wouldn't ever bee seen to measure up.

She was just a girl.

* * *

"Come out and plaaaay Grandpa Charlie!!!!!!"

Emmett was practically bouncing around a pair of SUVs Charlie had never seen in his life while the other Cullens unloaded their luggage.

Charlie himself was watching from upstairs standing in the open hallway which ran around the entire circumference of the house. The window in question looked out over the frozen wilderness and provided an excellent place to see the guests arrive from afar.

Bella had spoken to him for the first time a week ago after a weird call from Jacob Black which consisted mostly of 'What's it like?' and 'Are you still you?' questions. The kind of existentialist things Charlie wasn't ready to be answering.

And hadn't that been horrifying to discover? That Bella wasn't the only one lying, but Harry and Billy too, had been keeping secrets their whole lives and Charlie's world had been a carefully constructed bubble of curated information on all sides. He was stuck between being happy he could talk to his best friends still and bitter that he'd been shrouded in the dark for so long.

That it had taken what amounted to his death for the truth to be given to him.

"Emmett behave yourself and get your luggage before Edward tosses it all onto the snow like he did last year. You can harass Chief Swan later," Carlisle wasn't scolding the boy, the words actually sounded humored as if he actually thought the behavior was cute.

It was strange to watch them all clearly but still be lost on how to feel about it.

The Cullens had arrived on Friday the 23rd. One whole Week after Charlie's funeral and would be staying through New years.

Bella was to be spending the same days in Jacksonville with Angela Webber and Charlie was relieved that she'd used those tickets with someone who had been a real friend. Even if he'd have preferred it being Leah.

"I'll do it too! There's going to be a moose wearing your boxers," Edward threatened the larger boy and Charlie could hear the casual humor, as if this was how they always talked to each other while Alice ran about screaming like a toddler because Rosalie was kicking snow at her.

"Girls! Please! You'll have time to play in the snow when we're all unpacked," Carlisle actually sounded like a tired father then as Jasper moseyed up the steps towards Esme and Tanya who were greeting their cousins.

"This is your fault! We've gotten used to Mama being the mean one and you gotta pay for the gentle hand you've kept!" Jasper practically sang as he just waltzed inside without even a glance back to the others.

Carlisle pulled his own things up onto the porch and Esme laughed brightly as the man looked practically hunted, even to Charlie's eyes, as the Doctor sighed sounding exhausted,

"They've been this way since Isabella left, I'm beginning to think they're going to stage a revolt and demand we all head to Florida for Christmas."

Charlie heard Jasper shuffle in and leave his luggage over in one of the guest rooms. There were surprisingly 3 guest rooms on the left of the lodge aside from the already well lived int 4 bedrooms on the right of the house.

2 of them were sound proof suites and Charlie didn't know how to feel about that particular piece of information regarding the place he was still settling in. If he was sleeping, he'd probably still think this was all a dream and he'd wake up any second.

Jasper set up in a sound proof room and Rosalie followed him tossing her luggage in the other.

Charlie found he didn't even flinch as Jasper appeared beside him a bit calmly as he joined the pastime of staring out the window where Emmett had taken over terrorizing Alice with snow.

"How you settling?"

It was strange to hear the boy. The last time they'd seen each other, Jasper had ripped his arm off.

"Hard to say, ask me in another 50 years."

Jasper snorted as if it had been a joke and Charlie wondered when his life came this.... as the emphatic Vampire shook his head,

"See, you're settling better than you think. Even if you're fighting it. Y'know it's impressive you're even talking to me.

"Then again you were a law man. Discipline's in your veins."

Charlie didn't like how much knowing was dripping off those words but couldn't say anything to it as the rest of the Cullens piled in and made the place home with what seemed like a thousand new scents but...

They didn't bother him too much.

Because they recalled Esme slightly.

Eleazar had been right it seemed as Jasper and Alice were revealed to have been Sired by others, but even then their scents mingled easily with the rest of the family as if they'd settled with them and had nestled firmly in the melody of aromas that was purely 'The Cullens'.

Something bothered him though.

"I can't smell Bella."

He found himself standing in the living room staring at the Vampires he'd known for 3 years and tilted his head, really inhaling, searching for a Human scent before finding none.

"We, ensured to cleanse ourselves of her scent before arriving. To make the visit easier on you," Carlisle explained, but he looked like he was about to start smiling as the other's had that day Charlie'd emerged from the room talking,

"It is good to see you adjusting so quickly to this life."

Charlie hated that.

They all seemed to think he was doing so well when he barely felt like he was in the car at all most days.

Carlisle offered his hand to shake and Charlie swallowed hard, still not knowing how he felt about the bastard. He stared at the hand and reached out before gripping Cullen's proffered palm and found it strange to feel that Carlisle was the same temperature when the other man had always seemed so cold.

God.

Their hands parted before Charlie grit his teeth a bit as Emmett snorted, "Yeah we nearly had to leave Pops at home! As it was we had to stop in Seattle to get him a new wardrobe for the trip!"

Carlisle blinked and shook his head a bit at the boy but said nothing as Charlie really wished it wasn't true, especially when Edward sighed out, leaning towards Esme as if sharing a secret,

"We had to stay the night in Seattle too! Dad over here had to shower and spend the night at a hotel before he stopped smelling like O-Positive and strawberries."

"Enough you're all making Charlie uncomfortable," Carlisle maintained his bemused expression as Charlie realized the Doctor's eyes were nearly black with thirst,

"I ask you forgive them. They're very excited to be staying the holidays here."

"I'm sure," Charlie grunted a bit but ended up shoving his hands in his pockets, resigning himself to a noisy as hell holiday where he probably holed himself up in the den more often than not.

Emmett showed up behind him at mach speed, and Charlie was still a bit startled at how well he could track it. Eleazar said that Charlie was better at keeping track of people too, reading their movements. Just another aspect of his still rather finicky Gift.

"Gramps, you and me are wrestling! We're going hunting together and I'm whooping your ass!"

Charlie pursed his lips a bit as the others milled about, even Carlisle had made his way over to Tanya to strike up a conversation about some sort of furniture catalog which he immediately tuned out. Charlie turned his attention to Emmett and did his best not to frown,

"Don't call me Gramps or Grandpa, and I'm not going to be fighting anyone."

Alice came bounding over almost spritely and Charlie realized that Edward was sort of staring him down from the place the boy had sort of curled up on the couch with Kate.

"Awww! C'mon Grandpa Charlie! You won't mind it so much in a few years, trust me!" Alice winked and was on her way as if she'd never came at all.

"Well that means it's gonna happen," Emmett enthused on his way over to where Edward was still sort of staring wide eyed as Charlie felt like the circus had invaded, before realizing that was just what family coming over was like.

It was a feeling he hadn't experienced since that first Christmas with Renee and Bella... Their parents and Renee's Higginbotham cousins had all descended onto Forks. The wildness of that hectic Christmas to New Years was something he'd nearly forgotten, it was even hazier now but the feeling remained firm.

Something just like this.

The Cullens visit ended up being even more nerve wracking and Charlie did spend a good amount of his days calming down in the den he and Irina had sort of built. It was even funnier when Rosalie presented him with his clothes as Bella promised.

That was the fist time he'd felt like himself in a while wearing one of his old flannels with a pair of favorite jeans as well as some non slip work boots. The fact that it was freshly washed and didn't smell like anything but his old detergent was practically magical.

After that, it was a bit easier to be around the Cullens, even if he was still unsure of his feelings. Charlie wanted to know them, figure out who they were in the story of the lighthouse which no one took notice of.

He didn't expect to suss Carlisle out so completely or easily but the Doctor appeared to want Charlie to know. Because one late evening while the sky was clear, the milky way blanketed them, and Charlie sat on the deck railing waiting for Irina to return from her hunt with Alice and Rosalie, Carlisle leaned onto the balustrade next to him.

Wordlessly the blond Vampire offered him an envelope which was square but a bit thick.

Charlie had a million questions but took the thing and tried his best not to let his old anger resurface for this, as he exhaled, "This better be from Bella."

"It is," was the assuring response as Carlisle's now golden eyes roved over the barren landscaped, he'd gone hunting just after their arrival. Charlie also knew for a fact that every day around 10 PM Eastern Standard Time the Doctor sequestered himself into one of the sound proof rooms and made a phone call.

Realizing this was an olive branch, Charlie focused carefully as he tore the seal opened and felt a smidgen of pride as the thing busted exactly how he intended it only to experience a wave of shock, then sadness, before...

Warmth.

As he stared at stack of pictures printed out from the very gift he'd given Bella just months ago.

There she was in colored ink, with Angela playing poker with colorful game board money. Then, their fishing trip, with Harry and Seth too frozen in those moments of joy they'd shared.

A few from what had to be recently of her and the Cullen kids around the house. Another couple displayed Bella with Angela and Leah, all three of them arms linked with the Webber girl in the middle.

Last, there was one from Bella's birthday.

Not the one Charlie remembered, but a still image filled with such sweet innocence of Bella and Carlisle holding her cake as if presenting it proudly together as a prize for a game show.

"She's always thinking of things I never do," Carlisle whispered, breaking Charlie's silent reverie,

"You know she shines so brightly... I gifted her that necklace on her birthday.... I told her she was my North Star. Truly a bright light to guide my path in this dark life, but that isn't all she is to me.

"She shines so bright I think she might just be a _Daytime Moon_. It's a privilege to be the one she offers her light to even in the day. I.. I long to be her light too."

"Why are you telling me this?" Charlie knew it was coming out of gritted teeth, he felt like Eleazar may have said something, or perhaps even put Carlisle up to this to make him approve of their relationship. His anger was splashed out like water over a campfire though as the Doctor laughed but it contained no humor,

"I do want your approval. The last time we spoke my mind was a mess of worry and strife over Isabella and all I could think- All I could focus on was the fact that she was left alone with her mother.

"And we both know that Isabella is good at shouldering everything, forcing a smile and being the strength everyone relies on. Forgive me for what I'm about to say but her mother does nothing but take that for granted.

"Greedily takes and takes. Forgetting that Isabella is just a young woman. "

Carlisle turned his harsh glowing eyes to Charlie then and once more he felt like the Doctor could see through him,

"I was cold to you, brushed you off and set it all aside for later, but Isabella loves you. So for her I will try.

"You have always been a good man. We were something like friends... At least the closest thing I permit in my life when it comes to Humans.

"Isn't that strange? That you were my only friend in Forks? And you likely simply considered me a neighbor or an acquaintance. Perhaps we can be cordial once more if your hate for me has not been sealed in the Change."

Life was strange.

Charlie supposed.

That they were sitting here and Carlisle was confessing all this to him yet it felt less like a pity party and more like an attempt to allow Charlie to understand him better. Truly see the man for what he was and had always been, simply was required to hide.

"I thought of you as a friend," Charlie gave his own concession then as he took in everything Carlisle has said.

It was shocking, nearly comforting to know that the Doctor had seen Bella as Charlie had. That the man had seen the girl so strong and unyielding but silent in her power.

Yet he'd actually seen her even deeper.

Understood that she was just a young girl.

Charlie was on the verge of crying so he laughed instead because it was all he could do, "I respected you and that's why it hurt so much to find out you'd stolen my little girl.

"For a while I thought I might hate you but maybe I was just angry that I couldn't hate you because the more I really looked at it you were the kind of man I wanted for her when she was older.

"I used to think she'd never get the kind of love she needed because they didn't make men like that anymore. The kind that took care of girls like her, gave them a place they could rest.

"But I guess it works out because you were made when they first came into style. An original in mint condition."

It was startling to have Carlisle laugh, the sound of it almost bitter, or it would have been if it wasn't so frantically tragic sounding. In that unreal moment Charlie really stared at the blond Vampire and realized....

This was just a man.

In love with a girl.

A girl he knew he shouldn't be in love with but took that love anyways because everyone else saw him as this impossible thing. Bella didn't' though. That much was becoming harrowingly obvious. Charlie's own little girl was wiser than all these people who'd lived centuries to see beyond that stone will power.

Because she too was that tower that didn't break.

Two lighthouses across the bay from each other.

Charlie turned his gaze out to the forest as Carlisle sighed, the blond man's almost desperate laughter abating.

"Don't think this means I approve," Charlie knew his heat was dying, the coals were burning out not even attempting to survive in the face of what he was realizing,

"It just means... Hell, it means I don't hate your guts."

And that maybe one day.

When he was sure he was himself still.

Charlie just might be happy about the whole thing.

Carlisle just offered a tight smile, and said nothing.

Though Charlie was sure, if this man was really anything like Bella, he heard everything.


	5. January

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHO READ THE WRONG VERSION OF THIS CHAPTER??? LMAO  
> Listen, I'ts late here and I'm tired alright. Here's the actual 4th version instead of the 2nd?? 3rd?? I can't remember what that thing was. I rewrote this thing so many times.
> 
> "An older sister is a friend and defender - a listener, conspirator, a counselor and a sharer of delights. And sorrows too."- Pam Brown

As Charlie headed out the front door, because he liked to pretend he was still a little normal even though most of his November had been spent using the window as a portal, Alice chimed out to him from her place gazing out the front window on the hall overlooking the home,

"Emmett's gonna try to get you."

It was January 2nd and the Cullens were scheduled to leave the following Monday. Charlie was only just getting a accustomed to the noise and rowdiness of the bunch. Now they were getting ready to leave.

He wondered a bit at Alice though, she was just a little weird and always had something to say because she was apparently prescient and that was terrifying but Charlie didn't like to dwell on it much. Alice had been one of the Cullens he'd been slightly fonder of simply because she was a girl and Bella needed more girls in her life.

"He won't," Charlie replied, as he'd mostly kept his Gift to himself and, if Edward had plucked it out of the Denali's heads and told anyone what he was capable of, Emmett clearly wasn't one of them.

"I know."

And wasn't that a bit jarring as he crossed the threshold to find Esme and Tanya waiting for him.

"How's it feeling today Chief?" Tanya smiled toothily and Charlie wondered why she insisted on calling him that. Technically he had been the Chief of Police but even Carlisle had dropped the title in favor of his nickname.

"Like I fell off that tree again," Charlie replied a bit brusquely knowing the woman wouldn't mind, and she didn't as she let out a laugh like a song, he turned a glance to Esme but he wasn't actually angry about the whole thing,

"Thanks for that."

Esme raised a single brow at him and he got the feeling he was being teased, "It's always a pleasure to show someone up in tree climbing.

"I'm the best tree hopper on this side of the prime meridian you know."

Charlie had no idea who the hell could have been the best on the other side but never really asked before the three of them set off into the alpine forests around the lodge in hopes of rattling a few unsuspecting predators or even a moose if they had to. Because Charlie was learning that predators tasted better, they even smelled a bit more appetizing.

He learned that pretty quick.

There was a nervous energy which sort of played across his body as he hunted with the two women. Likely it was the knowledge that Emmett was going to attempt to cash in on his desire for a wrestling match. One that Charlie himself had been avoiding.

Sure, Bella said Emmett was frozen at 20 but the guy clearly had a skewed idea of how strong Charlie was at the moment. He scared himself sometimes and there was no way he was going to hurt the boy on purpose with the imbalance of strength.

Really, Tanya had taken Charlie out to show him the disparity one day and he'd been a bit appalled. It also instilled the fear of God into him because he'd gone at Carlisle and ended up on the ground pinned by the other man.

300 years too early indeed.

It was nice to know that good old fashioned experience and cunning could still get the better of brute force, but Charlie was mildly concerned about the fact that Carlisle had the know how in the first place. Then again, the Doctor had Changed all his children, save for Alice and Jasper, himself... Which was another thing Charlie was beginning to grow curious about.

In the end the whole thing happened when Charlie was stalking a moose. Really they weren't his favorite but they were huge and got the job done quicker than anything else and if Charlie wasn't going to be enjoying eating he was going to get it over with as fast as he could.

Esme was positioned upwind from him but still out of range for the animals in question while Tanya was crouched between them, a bit further back, completing their triangle like formation which they'd use to surround their prey and pounce.

His breathing had stopped altogether and Charlie was beginning to focus on his head. Preparing to stretch his Gift out so he could completely overwhelm the animal he'd singled out.

Then, Charlie instantly registered an incoming Vampire from down wind, just the lightest of sounds, the softest of foot falls that he likely wouldn't have noticed if he hadn't been attempting to sync his senses up with his query.

Before-

_**Whoosh** _

Emmett was flying at him and if Charlie hand't already drained a Caribou he'd have been a bit feral over the fact that the boy was making to tackle him.

Allowing his instincts to take over, Charlie rolled out of the way, then as the rather larger Vampire rushed him again for another go... Charlie grit his teeth and pushed against the shell which was always around his brain until it was as big as he could manage.

Since Emmett had been scrambling like mad, Charlie couldn't help the slight smugness that filled him when the boy slammed into the field which had his eyes widening in shock. The man basked in his amusement as a gleeful grin broke our across his face before he turned all his focus to keeping the field up.

The record was only 30 Seconds, but that was absolutely enough time for him to head towards a rather lethargically weighed down Emmett before tilting his head, then sort of just shoving him effortlessly to the ground before sitting atop the boy's back like he and Billy used to when they were teens and roughhoused. Taking a breath Charlie dropped his Gift before it shattered by force from strain only for Emmett to begin shouting petulantly,

"Are you kidding me?! This sucks!"

Head still a bit woozy from maintaining the field for nearly his limit, Charlie distantly registered that Tanya and Esme had gone for their prey in the ruckus while Emmett had likely nearly scared them all off.

"I told you I wasn't gonna fight you."

"No shit! Jesus that's scary as Hell!"

They sat like that for a moment as Emmett struggled to get out from under the man and Charlie, for some reason, couldn't find the pity to let the kid up.

Maybe it was a Vampire thing.

He wasn't sure.

Whatever it was had him sitting on Emmett as the boy squirmed and complained like nothing else until Esme and Tanya returned with rather amused smiles once they took in the rather odd sight.

After all, Charlie wasn't exactly hulking like Emmett was but, still, he'd overpowered the boy and pinned him for quite a while.

Finally, Emmett appeared to make an attempt at a rather half baked scheme as he completely stopped his fighting and sighed, "Fine. Alright. You got me."

"You're done?" Charlie didn't believe it for a second, with how the kid had been going on and on for so long, really, he wasn't an idiot and, while Emmett seemed less immature and more adventurous, that did nothing to change that fact that Charlie already knew every goddamned trick in the book.

Really.

You didn't have to be 300 to be capable of smelling hooliganism at 10 paces.

"Yeah."

"Say I won."

There was a silence and Charlie realized that yeah, Emmett was hoping to try something as he grunted like a 6 year old who'd been told he wasn't going to get to play with his favorite toy,

"We didn't even wrestle!"

"Because I kicked your ass before you could even touch me," Charlie couldn't help that he was practically laughing as he kept his perch on the larger Vampire, part of his brain carefully maintaining the the hold he had on the boy,

"C'mon kid, I'm thirsty, I still have a bit of gas in the rig for my Gift, and I don't want to waste it on you, but I will just so you stop trying to get me to punch a hole through you."

Emmett hummed a bit as if this was actually a negotiation before squirming a little, more experimentally than anything before sighing, "Fine, I'll get you though."

"Yeah, good luck with that, " Charlie sighed, because really what else was he supposed to say? Then the man hopped off the boy only for Emmett to get to his feet in an instant.

"Where's Edward?" Esme tilted her head a bit and Charlie scented to air but couldn't begin to understand why the woman thought the copper haired boy wold be with his brother.

"He headed back when I let slip what I was planning," Emmett shrugged lazily as if it was inconsequential before Charlie began trudging back into the forest ignoring them as Tanya trailed after him dutifully.

On the wind he could hear Esme giving her easy goodbyes so she could look after the 'Newborn' so he wouldn't get into 'trouble'. Charlie was just glad he'd only smelled Human once, because he was a bit terrified what it might do to him if he caught a scent like that again before his apparently 'Hellish' 6 months were over.

Nearly halfway out of the 'hardest part' everyone was saying and Charlie really was thrilled to find out what it might feel like to actually be in the driver's seat if only once in a while. In the end he cared less about what Emmett was up to than he did about getting his throat to stop aching and he was trying his best not to be a little angry the kid had interrupted what would have been his last meal for the next week or so.

Honestly he hated feeling like this but he knew there was few other options.

At least he went out to a forest and drank a moose instead of...

The other option was completely horrifying and Charlie liked to think it was the fact that he was desperately clinging to his own morals and humanity that the very thought of it still scared him to death.

Charlie managed a bear in the late evening and their trio where back at the house a bit after midnight.

Irina had run out to greet him with a hug and Charlie was happy to wrap his arms around the woman before swinging her about like they were a couple of teens. Really she wasn't quite his girlfriend but they were a pair.

It was startling how close to honest to God courting they were required to behave.

Charlie wasn't ready for more though. He wasn't even sure he was himself most of the time and Irina was still someone he was getting to discover slowly.

"Let's play billiards!" Irina offered brightly, her amber eyes nearly glowing in the night as Charlie placed her back on the ground gingerly.

"Yeah alright," Charlie allowed her to take his hand before dragging him away from Esme and Tanya who cooed like they were a pair of kindergartners telling everyone they were engaged because they'd shared their goldfish crackers. Making their way into the lodge, the noise washed over him but was quickly organized and sorted.

Jasper and Alice were nowhere to be heard but their scent was fresh so that meant they were in their room. Rosalie was in the garage tinkering with something while Emmett was sitting in the living room playing video game with Edward as well as Kate. Carmen and Eleazar were in the library arguing about the library of Alexandria.

And if Charlie really focused he could hear someone else with them, only because there was a very casual but rhythmic flipping of pages, which mean Carlisle was with them reading in the nook.

Still, Irina and him ambled to the game room and Charlie was happy to find himself at his most calm, both having grown more comfortable with the company of the Cullens, but also having just fed. The level of clarity attained when adding Irina's scent, it was rare and Charlie was more than happy to allow himself to be carried in the moment towards the billiards room.

"We tried to teach Bella how to play when she was here," Irina informed him as she released his hand in order to select a cue just as Charlie scanned the sports equipment while the woman continued over to the table in order to set up the rack,

"Her hand was hurt, so next time she visits we'll have to try again."

Charlie let himself smile a little at the thought. Really, he only ever seemed to think about the future when Bella was involved in some shape or form. How strange and difficult it was to imagine her in the very room he was standing in. Bella and Irina cut such different images, the idea of them next to each other was hard to reconcile, even though the two young women had met.

"Tell me more about the Bond," Charlie felt like it needed to be whispered as he carefully took hold of one of the cues lined up before turning on his heel to find the blond woman removing the rack to start their game,

"How do you make it permanent?"

"Well..." Irina sighed a bit as if it was complicated,

"Sex technically. I mean... We can't do that until the Coven approves though, and they don't generally until... well until a pair is in love."

"What's technical about that?" Charlie tilted his head a bit as the information appeared straight forwards and easy to understand. Irina shook her head lightly though with a grin,

"Well... Sex and love are the requirements to Establish the Bond. If i was Nomadic and it was just the two of us without any Coven to make happy were could have sex but the bond would just be how it is now.

"Its' the chemical reaction of love paired with the Bond and the hormones when mutual pleasure is reached that all come together and Establish the link."

He focused on the clear blue sky inside him and wondered how it might change if it was Established. That seemed nearly forever away though.

It sounded intense and nearly like it would be overwhelming. Hunting separately always made his chest feel a bit stilted or off but the sky was always righted once he caught sight of her.

"What changes?"

"Well you know it won't break," Irina grinned as she set up for a break and executed it perfectly,

"But according to society, we'll be married. Most Vampires don't do the whole walk down the aisle so if our Bond is established you're my Vampire Husband."

Her smile was glowing as if she couldn't wait for it, as if that was the thing Irina was running towards full tilt as Charlie took his turn at the table while processing the information.

"I do want a Wedding though," she declared as he made his shot successfully and tossed her a curious look because he had that itch in his brain again while Irina explained,

"I promised Kate she'd be my Maid of Honor since I was Tanya's and when Kate get's married it'll be Tanya. We worked this all out a long time ago since there's three of us and it was uneven."

Charlie laughed a bit at that, it was so soft and gentle how the three sisters cared and loved for each other, "Billy, Harry and I agreed on much the same. I stood with Harry, while Harry stood with Billy and Billy stood with me.

"We'd had it all worked out by the time we graduated from high school."

"Will he stand with you again?"

"I don't know..." Charlie sighed a bit, it would be nice to have his friend with him if he and Irina did get married. That wasn't something he wanted to really dwell on yet. Part of him was terrified of falling to fast again. Renee had been a happy accident which had only been happy because it resulted in Bella and, magic Vampire whatever notwithstanding, his new life was just.. too new still to even be considering something that would change his life even more.

"I'd like to at least go on a date first. Maybe a movie, or..."

"Or we can take a hunting trip out to Great Bear Lake, we could walk across it or go boating," Irina grinned brightly and Charlie couldn't help but huff out a laugh at the rather breathtaking prospect of that,

"Can we.. Can we actually walk across a lake?"

"We don't need to breathe, so yes. Getting water in your lungs is frustrating though it will eventually drain out if you manage it. I can teach you sign language! We can spend a whole day down there exploring!"

Her mind was such a strange thing that Charlie could only shake his head at the words. Really, though, he was never apposed to an outdoors experience, even if it was rather unreal sounding "Maybe when I'm less... It sounds nice, something to look forwards to in the future.."

Irina set up her shot before tossing him a chuckle, it was amazing that a laugh could be so lovely as she didn't even sound upset about his reluctance to commit to the idea of it,

"Maybe we can discuss traversing lakes later? For now though, I think showing you all my favorite mountain climbs is the best option for a date that doesn't require going into town."

"As long as I don't fall off a mountain I'll be happy with that for now," Charlie grinned right back and was happy to see that when she made her shot it was still perfect.

"And when we get to the tops, I can teach you how to ballroom dance. It's the most logical thing to do," Irina cheered with such excitement it was contagious.

"Clearly."

It was the most ridiculous conversation he'd ever had without getting frustrated about how rather insane his life was getting. Irina made him feel like he wasn't boring or too rigid in his point of view and Charlie knew she was only trying to help him adjust by talking about things casually. Not trying to make them seem like such giant changes.

Something about that was freeing as the idea of falling in love with her wasn't so hard to swallow. Irina already had his mind, and his heart felt less like it was falling and closer to packing up and getting ready to walk straight into love.

* * *

The Cullens left with more ruckus than they had any right to, though, Charlie had enough in him to be able to at least shake Carlisle's hand once more time as they said their goodbyes.

He was caught off guard though when the Doctor smiled so brightly he was showing his teeth, and in the calm, serene voice Charlie had known for nearly 4 years declared, "Feel free to call me.

"If ever you need anything or simply wish to talk. In my heart, as Isabella's father, you were a Cullen first."

Something told Charlie that this wasn't an attempt to be rude to Esme and Tanya who were standing happily with their arms slung around each other lazily, saying their goodbyes to the others. No, it was a promise that Carlisle's connection to Bella bound Charlie to them as well. Always had, and would have even if Charlie himself hadn't been bitten and never known it.

A promise.

"I'll remember that," Charlie had nodded and released the other man's hand as he knew he'd probably be grateful for the offer later. At the moment he still was a bit too nervous to have his phone on him when he didn't need it, but Irina always had it and left it in the room whenever she was away.

The extended family, which was apparently Charlie's too through magic and the inevitable of Carlisle marrying Bella, headed out south toward their home. He stood there watching the two vehicles shrinking into the distance and was rather surprised when Kate saddled up next to him before sighing.

"They'll be back next year, and if you push yourself Bella might just be able to come too."

Charlie frowned a bit then a she considered that, "I don't know if I'd trust myself that close to anyone, let alone Bella."

Kate gave single shoulder shrug, but it came off as more nonchalant for his sake rather than any actual blase attitude she might hold on the matter,

"5 years isn't that long anyways. So really it won't be too much of an issue so long as you keep up contact."

Charlie swallowed hard as he stopped himself from asking what the hell that meant because the image of Carlisle standing in front of that cottage was blaring in his mind like a siren.

_"Eventually Isabella's apparent age will match my own and no one will look twice at us."_

"How old was Carlisle when he was changed," was the question he asked instead and Kate's copper eyes roved over him assessingly as if she knew exactly what he might be thinking, a notion which was strange as her Gift was not anything like Edward's.

"About 23, he can feign a bit older because of how mature he is, perhaps even because the years growing up weren't so kind in the time he was a human and they aged him more than would be seen in a man of his equal today."

"Right," Charlie turned his own gaze down to the snow covered ground and tracked all the little crystals in the tire treads the visitors had left.

Bella was 18 and Carlisle was 23.

"So the age difference isn't actually that bad," he joked because it was all he could do not to grit his teeth and grow angry again at the thought of his daughter going trough the same thing he was in only 5 years. 5 years wasn't anything, even for a Human.

5 years only seemed like forever when you were young because so much was changing.

Bella would be a woman of 23 in 5 years.

And Carlisle would willingly, selfishly curse her to the same struggle Charlie himself was experiencing. Except Bella would have chosen it, eyes wide shut because there was no way anyone could imagine the horrors of what he was feeling, the struggle.

Bella could try, but actually going through those agonizing days... Only to be some rabid thing at the end?

Charlie was glad when Kate only let out a small chuckle at the words while his orange eyes traced those tracks like a prayer to God he stopped believing in a long time ago.

On Friday, the 13th of January, Charlie got what would be the call which established a brand new routine that he'd look forwards to and keep careful track of the days around.

But that was Friday.

On Wednesday...

On Wednesday Charlie messed up.

It was a nightmare, and if he was still capable of dreaming Charlie would have wished he could wake up and find himself back in bed that morning before the accident with Bella making breakfast. Back in that world where Carlisle was still a 33 year old backstabbing daughter stealing hustler and Charlie himself was the law abiding Chief of Police looking forwards to seeing his little girl graduate and get away from the drama she's decided to plunge herself into.

His life wasn't a machination of his own imaginings though and Charlie had been coming to terms with that as he stalked through the woods with Carmen, Eleazar, and Irina. Their quartet had been tracking a mountain lion which, according to them, he just had to try it.

And Charlie had drank enough animals to know that each species had a unique flavor profile thanks to their varied diets. So a mountain lion surely had to be different enough to be worth the small out of the way trek they were making.

So he'd followed their lead and it was a perfectly normal hunt.

One he'd run since arriving in Alaska where he synced up his breathing with whomever was leading their group. This time it had been Eleazar so Charlie honed himself onto the man as well as the scent he'd indicated belonged to their query.

The wind shifted, drifting in from the east and there was a saccharine smell on the breeze. Barely there, yet sufficient enough to fill Charlie's entire mouth with Venom as the burning in his throat stoked itself into a flash-fire before, for the first time since November, he was no longer slowly climbing over the center console of the car in an attempt to wrestle that wild animal out of the driver's seat.

He was in the back seat of the car while that creature he'd been fighting, and knew was just a another part of himself, was putting the pedal to the metal while Charlie himself closed his eyes like a coward.

Irina was screaming and Eleazar made a grab at Charlie's coat but it was't going to help.

Because Charlie had lost his grip entirely and that field of power around his mind ballooned, rendering everyone else with him helpless as he made his mad dash towards that sweet aroma.

He'd do his best to look back on that moment and search for reluctance, but to his own shame, Charlie hadn't felt any at all as he eyes landed on the trapper who had been wrestling a fox out of his net while another helped by holding back the excess. There was a cut on the helper's hand from the twined wire but it hardly mattered as the Humans' hearts pounded wetly, enticingly.

Fortunately, they were still a good distance away, and Eleazar was a man of many talents who'd participated in more Rodeos that Charlie could even fathom as he suddenly registered a whizzing noise but couldn't tear his eyes of his prize. Something slammed into him and it was enough to have the field breaking as he tumbled to the ground.

The weight on his back increased and Charlie screamed against the force before a sharp pain slammed into his neck until-

A sensation which resembled pain, then complete blackness overtook him like being knocked unconscious by bulldozer.

Coming to was far too much like the horrific hangover he'd experienced the night after Renee left him with a note and not so much as a by your leave as his brain sort of jiggled and the light of the room he was in was too bright. Suddenly Charlie realized he was back in his and Irina's room.

The picture of Bella and Carlisle dangled across from him, hanging on a string like a pennant with the other printed squares and Charlie realized he'd been unconscious.... Then woke up at home....

"What the hell just happened?" It was nearly rasped as his thirst still burned persistently, Irina sat across from him, eyes nearly black as she offered a bit of a shy smiled,

"Eleazar threw a boulder at you, then ripped your head off."

"Because I almost... Because I went after some people," Charlie sighed as he realized that he'd come so close to being something he feared. The thing he'd never wanted to even consider.

The part of him which had been forced back and closed it's eyes raged at the one driving. He'd never done anything worse than break curfew and maybe ditch school. Charlie Swan was the Chief of Police since he was 35 and had been a upstanding citizen who'd never raised his voice or even got into a fight when he was out drinking with his friends.

But as he allowed Irina to take his hand and whisper assurances, Charlie added attempted murderer to that list.

Because that's what he'd done.

He'd come so close to killing two men who were just out minding their business trapping animals.

Foxes were in season 'til February. He knew. He was a sportsman and foxes had been in season since September.

Charlie began to shudder as he curled up in the corner of the room, before he inhaled and for once was happy that his throat was burning, "I almost killed them."

"We've all made mistakes," Irina informed him softly, an attempt at comfort, to be kind and assuring that he'd not done anything they wouldn't forgive him for,

"It happens, it's part of this life. Remember we choose to be better than our mistakes, rise above what is considered natural. Every other Vampire actually goes through with what you nearly just did and waltzes off being happy they've been fed.

"Feeling guilty means you've clung to your humanity."

"I almost killed them!" Charlie wheezed as he wished he could feel disgusted until he was nauseous but only disappointment would nestle in his belly. No sickness or discomfort. Perhaps that was the worst part.

"You'll be stronger next time. Charlie this was always going to happen. We all have accidents! Yours barely even counts because nothing actually happened."

"Carlisle doesn't."

"That's different," Irina sighed as she gazed at him, her eyes nearly black as he'd ruined their trip because of his own inability to control himself.

"I thought we all made mistakes!" Charlie hissed and he wished it didn't sound so angry, he wasn't mad at her. His own weaknesses were no reason to yell.

Blinking slowly Irina gripped his hand tighter as if she was afraid he'd let go, "We do but Carlisle isn't like us and you can't compare yourself to him. So we all make mistakes and we trudge on, live with that guilt and use it to remind yourself that this is what happens when you smell that scent.

"You fight. It's all you can do. Fight and remember you want to be better."

Charlie could feel his throat tightening as his chest shook with the force of his upset only to find his tears not coming. He couldn't cry anymore but he wished he could. A great dry sob heaved it's way out of his body before Irina wrapped her arms around him in the warmest and most comforting hug he'd ever experienced.

They sat there in the comfort of the den which they had built until Charlie got a hold of himself. Easily, it was the most intimate thing he had ever done with another person. Irina simply ran her hand up and down his back soothingly while Charlie let it all crash down.

His sorrow and raging anger at himself for being scared to try, for using his own Gift against his new friends. Like a child throwing a tantrum and shattering the cookie jar before shoving as many as he could into his mouth before bolting.

Without even realizing he'd only filled his cheeks with glass.

That night, Charlie hid himself uselessly in one of the soundproof rooms while Tanya and Esme milled about in the house with Kate. Irina, Eleazar and Carmen still needed to feed after all and Charlie wasn't exactly willing to go out at the moment no matter how much his throat was aching. Terror was enough to hold him back.

He stared at himself in the floor length mirror on the wall and hated that his black eyes refused to turn orange, ever closer to the gold he'd nearly broken. Reluctantly he turned his attention in order to stare at the phone he'd lightly tossed on the bed.

All his attention upon the device Charlie grit his teeth and wished he could just smash the damn thing. Due to the nature of the room , the man couldn't even hear Tanya creeping up the stairs and halt at the door. He didn't even register her presence until she was knocking and cracking the thing opened before calling out,

"You alright with me coming in Chief?"

Part of him wished she'd leave. Just let him wallow in a room which smelled strange and didn't have pictures of his daughter mocking him. Instead of anything substantial he grunted as he tossed himself on the bed, knowing she wouldn't hear, his refusal to go to the door and reject her explicitly was apparently enough of an approval for her as she came in and tucked her hands into her jean pockets before shutting the door with her foot,

"Alright Chief, go ahead and tell me what happened. Only you can, Irina's not going to tell your secrets and it's not Eleazar or Carmen's place."

He huffed out a harsh laugh with no humor at her brusqueness which was coated in concern, but it was welcome to how everyone else seemed to be treating him like he might just shatter as the Vampire sort of nudged the bed with her boot.

It felt like sitting in a confession booth, but there was no priest, only his sister who was older by an entire era while Charlie whispered, as if the other's might hear, "I almost killed two people today."

And instead of being rude or uncaring by cruelly just spitting 'sucks' or even displaying the pity of Eleazar who had pat Charlie on the shoulder and said, "That's good y'know, the almost part. Means the Treaty with your friends Tribe is still intact. Nobody's gonna blame you for a close call."

Tanya sort of tilted her head at him, her voice steady, with no alteration to her already kind tone, "How are you feeling?"

And once again he broke as he cried like a little boy, "Like a monster."

"People kill people too Chief, you know that better than most. Those are the real monsters," Tanya didn't even seem to flinch as her calming words washed over Charlie like another hug,

"Your instincts are at their most powerful at the moment, it's easy to be terrified by them and allow them to guide you. Just try remember that you were not a monster when you were Human, cling to that and you can prevent yourself from truly becoming one now."

"How did you do it? How did you go through this without killing anyone?" Charlie knew his words were demanding but his emotions were like the ocean during the storm, crashing around frantically.

"Chief," Tanya paused and let out a sigh as she dug her toe into the floor and confessed, "I used to live by killing people. Used to just pick a guy, any guy and play a little while before sucking him dry and calling it a day.

"I lived like that. I was the monster. Years, centuries, that was how I hunted. How our entire Coven hunted. We didn't even switch over because we were nice.

"Not at first. The idea of feeding on animals was something Carlisle sort of moseyed into town with and we sort of found gross. Besides, anyone who had tried it before always went back to Human blood because it just tasted better. It was easier.

"We all just took the easy way because we liked it."

Swallowing hard, Charlie wondered for a moment how many people Irina had killed, how many Tanya and Kate had slaughtered. Even Eleazar? Carmen? How many lost their life because it was just easier?

"What changed?"

"Well..." Tanya let out a chuckle but it wasn't even amused, "We liked having sex with Humans, but the rush and the intensity always resulted in losing control and crushing them, even feeding on them.

"It was... It was disgusting. Feeling like a black widow, seeking out pleasure and then eating the person who'd just wanted a good time. We.. I became terrified I may not be able to find pleasure without the kill."

Charlie closed his eyes as the horrifying words registered in his mind, how grotesque it must have been, to begin to see something so perverse as normal. Sex then dinner. What kind of disconnect you needed to be capable of to do such a terrifying thing.

"So we began feeding before we entertained company but not even that worked," Tanya looked at him then, intensely, "Animals was the only way to do it.

"Because we couldn't have fun unless we stopped seeing our guests as food."

Silence.

Charlie wondered then at the fact that Carlisle had never fed on a person.

He was beginning to understand how great and powerful a feat that was.

"We grew a conscience later, and when we met Carlisle again... I felt like we owed him a great debt. Like he'd saved our souls because he'd proved you could live on animals and he was really the only reason we'd given it a real chance."

Tanya then kicked at the bed again, "You've got it good my friend. You've got the chance to say, you've only nearly killed two people and that makes you better than all of us. Save for Carlisle, but he's got an advantage.

"You see when we are reborn our Human traits or magnified. Carlisle was always a gentle soul and we all view him as Gifted in his Compassion and Self-Control."

"I used my Gift on them, the others... " Charlie revealed no longer feeling like it was a confessional as Tanya had sort of proved he wasn't the most irredeemable creature in the world. She and her family had fed on Humans for so long and simply quit.

It was close to inspiring that they had all managed to change.

Screw that.

It was practically a biblical account of fortitude and redemption.

As he expected, Tanya didn't sigh or scold him, "That is unfortunate, truly it is, but you are not the only Gifted Vampire who has struggled.

"I'm sure Kate would be happy to talk to you about her own fight with switching her diet."

"And when it happens again?!" Charlie finally cut through the bullshit, hit the bone of it as he grit his teeth and knew that, while he was anguished, there was a particularly dark hatred for the thought of Bella making the same mistakes,

"What am I supposed to do when it keeps happening?!"

"The successful plan for failure but work towards success," Tanya replied easily as she offered a light shrug,

"You almost killed those men. Yes. So next time, when it's on the wind you remember this moment and tell yourself _'No, I never want to feel like that again_ '."

"How do you do it?" was what tumbled out because really it's all he could say in the face of such advice,

"How do you just... Tell yourself no after all those years of having it?"

Tanya offered a smile then, as she sowed off her pearly whites, "I find satisfaction in other aspects of the hunt. The chase when your an Animal Drinker is much more satisfying!

"Don't you think it's more thrilling to have a contest of strength with a bear? Feel the rush of hunting through the thicket as you track down and pummel a moose which weighs nearly a ton?

"Why would the beast in me find happiness in the easy stupid prey of a Human? There's a difference, after all, between a tigress and a man eater who's grown lazy and prefers the simple chase of a Human. If anything, Vampires who feed the easy way are not the Apex predators they believe themselves to be.

"It is us who fight for our food and must best the beasts of the wild."

The words sounded poetic to him, as she spoke of their way of life as something so freeing and wild. As if they were the ones who had it good, and maybe they were.

"Thank you," Charlie met her eyes and found them clear and lacking judgment as he offered his appreciation for her comforting words.

Tanya shook her head as she reached over to him and shoved his shoulder lightly like an annoying sibling he'd never had, "It's my job as your new big sister Chief!

"I'm here to look after you."

And Charlie smiled.

It was thanks to Tanya really that he was able to make it through that first call with Bella on Friday without breaking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm tired... I'm going to bed and hoping that only a maybe one or two of you read the wrong version of this.


	6. February

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “If life was a dream, then dying must be the moment when you woke up. It was so simple it must be true. You died, the dream was over, you woke up. That's what people meant when they talked about going to heaven. It was like waking up.”  
> ― Ian McEwan [The Daydreamer]

Whittling or woodworking was something to consider. Charlie had always wanted to go to college for something like engineering or mechanics but with the path his life had taken? Well he needed something a little more relaxing.

Wood always seemed to be peaceful, and with his new ability to smell literally everything he was beginning to find it even more so than before.

Not that he wasn't paying attention to the phone he was holding lightly against his ear while he sat on the the railing of the deck outside. Charlie's mind could focus on what seemed like a million things now that he was 3 months into his new life. He could hear Irina, Kate, and Carmen dancing to some classical music he only knew was Chopin's Nocturne because Irina had told him so. Apparently they enjoyed making choreography... For fun.

According to Kate, Ballet was also useful in combat if you were creative enough and Charlie wasn't going to ask more on the matter.

Because he wasn't trying to pay attention to the three women dancing, nor was he trying to listen to Eleazar and Esme arguing about the type of tables they should order for the house in Ontario while Tanya watched trashy T.V. in the living room.

No.

Charlie was trying to focus on Bella telling him about the fact that Carlisle had taken her on a trip to Seattle. Bella was going on about Lion's Heart in Pike's place which was a book store or something and she really kept going on about it. Charlie was practically rebuilding the thing in his head before he took a breath he didn't' need at the thought of all the places the couple had gone to, realizing that they probably spent the night.

Which was confirmed when Bella informed him, "And the Hotel had this restaurant and in the morning there was strawberry crepes that I know I'm going to be having dreams about forever. "

"I'm glad you had a good time," Charlie swung his legs just a little feeling like a boy as he did so,

"There's something I've been a bit curious about though."

Bella hummed and Charlie did his best to sound truly curious, because he was. Really, he wasn't trying to accuse anyone of anything even though it made him uncomfortable not knowing. That was just his Dad instincts in overdrive which he was proud to say seemed stronger than ever,

"Did you ever manage to get The Beast running? I mean... I know the Cullens like driving you around but you need your own car too. "

There was a long silence.

Like Bella didn't want to tell him and Charlie was suddenly terrified that Carlisle had been the one driving her around now that his shifts had been cut so dramatically. His dread only grew tenfold as Bella sighed,

"Alright, don't freak out."

"I'm freaking out Bells, that's my natural state right now. I'm either staring at snow pretending I'm alright or freaking out," Charlie hissed and was a bit upset that he hadn't managed to keep his cool like he'd wanted but most days he wasn't actually too bad anymore. She seemed to understand though as she whispered a truly contrite apology before carrying on,

"When we were in Seattle Carlisle bought me a car."

Yeah.

Alright.

It was worse.

"Bella honey, where's The Beast?"

"Sitting in the driveway with a cover over it until I can remember to ask the boys to move it to the Garage over at Carlisle's"

Charlie hadn't felt the ants marching in a few weeks but now they were swarming all over him as his spine tingled a bit at the idea of Bella driving around one of those flashy as hell cars the Cullens were always parading around in. What everyone was probably saying! Charlie couldn't handle the thought of his daughter's reputation getting shredded even more so shortly after his greatly exaggerated death.

"Dad, really, it's just a small truck!"

Heaving a breath he didn't need, Charlie grit his teeth, using every bit of strength he had not to start screaming hysterically, he personally thought he'd done alright so far , even if his throat felt as if a pipe wrench had clamped over it when he asked,

"Is it a _truck_ or a _car?_ "

"It's a Ranger. Just.. It's a year old and Carlisle really let me take the lead on the whole thing and... It's- It's an early graduation present," Bella sounded like she was really pushing for Charlie to just accept it and move on. There was something lying under it though. Like she and Carlisle had actually argued and Bella was just trying to accept whatever concessions had been made on both sides and toss the matter away entirely.

He wasn't a nosy man.

But Charlie worried about Bella a lot. More than he used to. Especially having her alone in that house. Sure Leah was with her most of the time, but Leah wasn't a parent and Carlisle wasn't going to act like a dad. Who the hell knew what Bella got up to with the guy.

Apparently it involved buying trucks.

"You both agreed though? He didn't make you buy it?"

She let out a light chuckle but Charlie wasn't sure what emotion was coating it as the tone of the laugh was neither amused or upset, "Yeah, I agreed. Besides it's just to get me around until I can manage to get The Beast running again. I was supposed to get mechanic lessons from Jacob but..."

Charlie hummed as he could see exactly where that trail led off towards. The path was more than a little unsure and Charlie was still waiting for Billy or Harry to call. Both men no doubt very busy with everything which had transpired as well as their own health, still though.. It had been 3 months. Part of him wondered if his friends were waiting for his 6 month Newborn period to be over. Which, would make sense, but Charlie was beginning to realize that he might just still be him... Even if he had a few new instincts and add-ons. He might just be Charlie Swan who had a wider view of the world.

People changed with time. Nobody was ever the same person they had been a few years before. Life experience and choices led you places you might not otherwise have gone. Sure, the life of an Animal Drinking Vampire was difficult. But what made Vampire Charlie who whittled better than Retired Cop Charlie who Whittled?

Really thinking about it, with all the struggle and fighting he'd been doing, Charlie realized that only one had a daughter and probably a wife who'd never leave him while the other had to bury a child and likely attained a heart which had grown unable to let anyone else in.

Maybe he was waking up. Maybe he didn't mind.

"I didn't-" Bella once again sounded nervous, "I was hoping to talk about the house. I'll be going to College next September and I know you love this house. I was born in this house, but I don't know if I can maintain it while I'm away and I don't want to rely on Carlisle to be paying for it.

"So I can rent it out, or sell it. Either way I'm sure Carlisle and Jasper can figure out a way to get the money to you."

"Bella, if you rent that house out you'll just have to sell it later," Charlie blinked slowly as he caught sight of a rather daring fox darting along the edge of the pines in the distance. The creature was bold indeed to have entered the Denali's territory,

"Sell it."

"What?!"

"That house was for your mother and me and you," Charlie swallowed the little Venom that was in his mouth and for the first time it was dry,

"When you're done with it... Then it's served it's purpose. Besides, you'll have a house in Forks already when you want to go back in 80 years or however long you all decide to wait."

"What about you?" Bella sounded like the house was an old dog they were planning on putting down, so Charlie attempted to be sensitive to her feelings but he already had the clothes he'd loved, photos of Bella and he was sure she'd send up his other things if he asked.

"If I go back, I"ll just stay with you."

"Oh," and it sounded like she understood. That Bella had registered that the house had only been clung to because Charlie wanted a place for his baby girl when she came to visit on the holidays. He was only one man and didn't need that kind of place, it was too big for one person. She was learning that from experience now.

"So you're getting along with everyone still?" Bella never lingered in the things that had already been solved and Charlie was glad. He hated suffering the awkward 'so that's that then' conversations and was pleased to find none of his Coven Members had that particular quality either.

"Yeah, Tanya says when I'm no longer a 'Punk' She'll teach me how to fight for real."

That got Bella to laugh, genuinely and full of such mirth it warmed Charlie down to his crystalline bones. The feeling of it was enough to have Charlie smiling, all the worry he'd had before washed away as Bella's joy nearly filled him.

"I'm glad you're making friends," the girl sighed and there was a distinct noise as if she was ruffling her own hair while someone entered the house without saying anything. Charlie only had a moment to be curious as Leah's voice suddenly cheered,

"Hey Charlie! Tell Bella that ranch doesn't go on potatoes because you raised some sort of alien!"

It was his turn to laugh then as his shoulders shook, the man's chest rumbled at the image of Bella pouring ranch on her fries like she always did, and never failed to earn odd looks when they were at the diner.

"This is my call!" Bella had likely pulled the phone away from her ear because the words were shouted but not so close, "Call him yourself! Honestly!"

"I'm not gonna call your dad!" Leah's tone was incredulous but she said nothing else as Bella continued as if they hadn't been interrupted,

"And how's Irina?"

"Fine, she's... Nice," Charlie really wasn't a poet and things between them were still new, slow, and rather surprisingly easy, "Things are still a bit... Crazy... But I think I'm coping."

"Anything planned for Valentines day?" Bella pressed lightly and Charlie wondered if Irina expected to celebrate at all. They were only at the 3rd so she still might bring it up.

"No, we'll probably just go climbing, you?"

"Carlisle's taking me out to diner, I don't know where yet though. It's a surprise he says," it was startling to hear that she wasn't nervous or annoyed at the idea of being surprised by someone and Charlie realized this was something else. Like the dancing thing Jasper had brought up in front of the cottage. Bella like surprises too, only... Maybe she only liked them from Carlisle?

No.

That didn't seem quite right.

She'd loved her truck the moment she'd laid eyes on it. So, Charlie figured, she might only like surprises when the person giving them got it right. And the fact that Bella seemed excited for Valentines day meant that Carlisle was always getting it right. Suddenly, it dawned on him that he himself had done pretty damn good recently too.

It was a thought which had the man smiling,

"Well I hope you have fun."

"I will, you have fun too. I know you're still on house arrest but I still want you to have fun."

"I'm thinking about taking up woodworking."

Bella didn't laugh or make jokes, her voice actually sounded enthusiastic as she informed him, "I can actually see you doing that! If you do start trying it out, you should send Carlisle the pictures so I can see them!"

Her reaction was almost enough to make him do it regardless of the fact that he still hadn't really made up his mind yet. Really, the only way to know if you liked something was to try it he supposed. Woodworking was a great place to start. Besides, he had a pretty long time to figure out what he wanted his hobbies to be.

Who knew? He might just end up going fishing again, only now he would just catch and release.

Now that...

That sounded like a pretty good time.

"Alright, but if I make a horribly misshapen chair you're going to have to sit in it."

"I love you dad, and I'll be happy to sit in your messed up chairs from another dimension."

"I love you too Bells."

* * *

"You wanna play soccer?" Esme had plopped herself down next to him as Charlie was actually reading an honest to God work book on carpentry on one of the sofas in the library.

"Is this like the tree thing?" Charlie frowned and felt nervous, only because Esme was really nice and had turned absolutely monstrous the moment he accepted the offer of a tree climbing competition that one time.

He never wanted to fall out of a tree again.

Charlie was quickly learning that he'd become a man who had a very long memory.

"No, this involves everyone and probably a game of rock paper scissors to figure out who gets you on their team," the woman tilted her head, her dark hair sort of swishing around her a bit as she grinned brightly,

"We play with a medicine ball and otherwise it's a normal game with smaller teams."

Charlie filled his cheeks with air and as he allowed them to deflate he tossed the book very gently onto the table, "What the hell, sports are fun..."

Sports weren't something he did more than watch really. Charlie Swan may have been in alright shape, perhaps fast as hell at running according to Human standards, but he wasn't exactly a guy who played anything more than a friendly game when he was a teenager. Even then it was mostly football in the park or basketball.

Soccer wasn't his game of choice and he never had enough friends for a game of baseball.

But as his new Coven set up outside, he was beginning to really register it wasn't going to be just soccer. Because how could he forget how fast and strong they all were?

He was on a team with Irina and Eleazar while Esme, Kate, Tanya and Carmen took to the other side of the field.

"This isn't fair!" Irina shouted from her place guarding their goal which consisted of two poles they'd set up just a few moments earlier and mirrored the ones which Tanya was standing between more than a 200 yards away,

"You have 4 people!"

"You have Charlie!" Kate replied incredulously as if that explained everything and Charlie would have agreed but it wasn't like he was some amazing soccer player.

"How do you know he can even play?!" Irina reasonably asked, even though he'd never exactly told her he didn't play sports. He'd told her he followed the major leagues but...

"Charlie, do you know how to play soccer?" Esme chuckled as if she was humoring two children and yeah.. That's what it was looking like but Charlie just nodded letting out a bit of an affirmative grunt, because that's a thing he found himself doing now when he found he didn't actually think a question was worth a drawn out answer.

"See!" Tanya enthused which caused Eleazar to duck his head ostensibly to hide a laugh, but the man wasn't really fooling anyone. He apparently found the whole thing as funny as Charlie found it confusing.

"He's a Newborn!" Irina tossed her hands up as if the others were being unseasonable and Charlie finally piped in in an attempt to support her,

"I'm not responsible for injuries. Esme invited me."

"You'll be fine Chief!" Tanya laughed as if he was cute and not an actual bulldozer at the moment.

"Irina if it's really bothering you I can sit it out," Esme offered kindly as if this was something she was expecting. Charlie really didn't know what to do because really it was a weird thing to be arguing anyways. He had a feeling Irina had just brought it up to annoy Tanya.

"No Esme, you're fine honey!" Irina grinned sweetly and that was that. Nobody actually seemed angry or upset so really who was he to complain? Finally Esme gave a mighty finger whistle even Charlie was jealous of as the game began in earnest.

Everything was frantically fast as he moved with Eleazar, while Carmen and Esme had immediately taken to a tactic they likely used frequently. Kate quickly took hold of the ball and made a rush to the goal while her teammates protected her at all costs.

Kate was fast.

Eleazar had said that out of their entire family, the Cullens included, Kate ranked Second over all losing only to Edward in sheer speed. Later, when Charlie's Newborn months were over he'd race her and lose by inches. He'd been quite a runner in his days having to chase down idiots and teenage troublemakers and apparently Kate had been a bodyguard so they would both shake hands and conceded they would work together if the time ever came.

At the moment though?

Charlie was a hell of a lot faster.

So any chance he got he'd try and steal the ball before running it to the goal Tanya was guarding. Kate was incredible though and her skill paired with experience easily kept Charlie in the lurch. The entire game was practically playing in micro seconds and Charlie found himself exhilarated.

Hunting was the closest thing he could compare the whole experience but even that was more intense and necessary. This? Their game wasn't coated with thirst or need.

This was pure unadulterated fun, the kind which Charlie hadn't partaken in since he was young and dumb, but full of life and dreams. He'd never gone through a midlife crisis, or whatever, in order to recapture that feeling. Charlie had been content with his lot in life to be the silent reliable Chief of Police who raised his daughter the best he could and maybe was a nice cool place for her family to visit in the summer when she got married and had kids of her own.

Things were different now, and while he hadn't been expecting it, Charlie felt.. He felt so very _alive_ it was enough to have him throwing his arms in the air and whooping like a teenager when Eleazar managed to score a goal after stealing the ball. It was so overwhelming that Charlie even scooped the other man up in a fireman's carry and spun them before falling to the ground like a stupid kid which only led to Eleazar tackling him right back.

And they wrestled.

Honest to God.

And, as the rest of the Coven piled in and began some sort of Vampire-dog pile, Charlie felt sheer joy down to his very core.

It was unshakable.

In the end, despite his Newborn abilities, Kate's team won and really they earned it tooth and nail because Vampire Soccer was apparently the most fun you could have. Period. Full Stop.

As they all ambled towards the house, still shoving each other and feeling like children, Esme sighed contentedly, "Just wait until we do Coven on Coven Baseball with the cousins! It'll be killer."

Charlie let out a laugh which burst up from deep in his belly just trying to imagine how crazy baseball would be with that many Vampires and he knew it would probably be just as big of a blast. In that moment, it was the first time he couldn't wait to share something like this with Bella.

And it wasn't so terrifying.

* * *

On the 27th of February, when Charlie was actually having a goddamned snow fight with Kate, because apparently he'd landed on her snow man when he leapt off the balcony railing and she was demanding justice, his phone rang from Irina's pocket where she was lounging on the steps of the house actually making snowballs to help her sister pelt him with.

All 3 of them froze and while the movement in the house continued on like normal, Charlie and Irina's eyes met before he looked at Kate before she shared a look with Irina.

Bella only called on Fridays and a Friday it was not.

Quick as a shot, Irina pulled the phone out of her pocket and tossed it to the man without even looking as he caught it being extra careful not to smash the gas station pay as you go phone.

His orange eyes fell on the ID and he immediately flipped the phone opened, uncaring of the fact that Kate and Irina's senses were fully honed on him like wide eyed hawks.

"Hello?" Charlie spared a moment to be terrified that someone may have accidentally just dialed him with that phone and didn't expect the supposedly dead Chief of Police to answer but it was too late.

Fortunately it was Harry's voice that came through a bit unsure, "Charlie?"

"Yeah Harry, it's good to hear from you," he couldn't help the absolute nervousness that seeped through into the words.

"You sound different," was what the man said and alright. He knew that, but not even Bella had said as much. Charlie supposed she expected him to change though. It was likely Carlisle was slowly breaking down for her all the things she needed to expect when... When.. When her time came.

Charlie tried his best to ignore Irina's subsonic vibrating next to him as well as Kate's beaming expression as if this was the most exciting thing to happen since he'd fallen out of that tree.

"Yeah... I guess I've changed a bit," Charlie conceded a bit unsure of how to go about the whole thing, "I'm not so different though. Got a little more fight in me.

"What about you though? Bella says you've been healing up like a champ."

Harry's voice cracked then like he was near tears and Charlie had to cough passed the lump forming in his throat as his long time friend replied,

"Yep, that son in law of yours fixed me up and I'm better than new. Sue's chasing me with greens still. Our girls make sure I have company during the day. Bella spends plenty of time here now, when Leah can't.

"She's a good girl Charlie, you should be proud of her. Seth loves her to bits and started calling her Izzy, drives her crazy."

Covering his mouth, Charlie heaved a dry sob as it registered that Bella was doing far better than he ever realized. Than she'd ever shared. That was just like her though wasn't it? To be bending over backwards to right his wrongs of being unable to help out the Clearwaters when he'd meant to.

"You better be letting Sue shove whatever she wants on your plate, she doesn't deserve another scare like that."

He knew it came across more broken than humored but Harry too sounded like he might be crying, a luxury Charlie knew he himself didn't actually have anymore. Suddenly he felt arms wrap around him and found, not just Irina, but Kate hugging him, providing strength and comfort.

Charlie had never shrunk back from Irina as her scent had always made her comfortable, but he was rocked to his core to find that Kate's affections also soothed his growing ache of longing to see his friend again. Even as Irina's hand running up his back sent a special wave of assurance, Kate's head tucking itself into him made Charlie feel empowered, knowing that he belonged to her too in a different way which was no less special than the clear blue sky in his chest which belonged to Irina, his Mate.

"Yeah I know, I get enough from Billy I don't need to hear it from you too," still the other man's tone was unsure but the confidence was growing as if he'd learned something and it fortified him as he continued,

"How long do you have until you're suitable company?"

"2 1/2 months before I'm no longer 'New' and I guess we'll figure it out from there," Charlie informed his friend, he'd been keeping track meticulously and could likely tell Harry the number of days and hours if pressed more adamantly but the other man was content with that answer as he sighed.

"You know Charlie, the boys are in uproar about you still. I couldn't stay away anymore though. Billy and I talked, we said... We agreed that you were still Charlie as long as you did it like the Cullens," Harry sounded like it cost half his fortune to concede to that, as if he'd given it all up just for Charlie and it nearly was enough to have the Vampire close to tears once more,

"You're our friend, nothings gonna change that alright? I know I've been stubborn and a bit mean, so if Bella's torn into me during her calls I deserve it. Billy does too but... But I'm not gonna toss out all those years just cause you like your meat even rarer these days."

Kate used her free hand to cover her mouth, concealing her laugh at the words, while Charlie pressed his lips together as a smile was threatening to break out across his face as Harry was just being himself and it was almost unreal to have someone who knew him as a human, that wasn't Bella, talking to him. Like a magic barrier had shattered and broken linking his old life to the new eternally.

Charlie Swan wasn't dead, never had been. The people who cared about him most, his family knew and at the end of the day, it was all that mattered to him. Not Renee, or Phil, not the boys at the station. Even though he'd trained and perhaps cared about them a little more than a boss should because dammit he might have been quiet but Charlie cared about the people he was responsible for. Except now they didn't matter so much, not in the face of the fear that he might never had heard from Billy and Harry again.

Because he may have cared about those boys but Charlie didn't love them. Not like he loved his childhood friends. Sure they'd kept secrets, but so had Bella. He was just happy to have them all gone, destroyed and now there was no longer a barrier interupting communication between them, they could just breathe.

They could let him into that place between them he'd always felt but simply thought existed because he was white and they were Quileutes. Maybe it was nice to get rid of that lurking fear that he loved them more than they had ever loved him.

This call proved that it was incorrect.

That Charlie Swan was so very loved that it ached in the best of ways.

Really, all he could manage to reply with was, "Thanks Harry, it's good to hear that. I can't say I wasn't worried, about you and Billy and about everything. I know.. I know it's gonna be different but I'm still me."

"I know Charlie, Bella keeps telling me that and hearing you now? I know."

They talked a little longer, reminiscing and just exchanging information, at some point Kate had removed herself from him and went back to her snow sculpting while Irina pulled away, but remained holding Charlie's hand in solidarity. It was nice to just hear Harry go on about people, and things Bella just didn't know about because she lived a different life than Charlie had. It was also strange to hear about Bella from Harry.

Because half the things she was up to she just omitted from their conversations like they weren't important.

Still though, by the time he'd hung up, he was smiling contentedly as he closed his eyes before turning to Irina and Kate, then openly declaring,

"I'm thirsty, do you want to go with me? Maybe take down a couple of moose?"

And it was strange but it was becoming his life.


	7. March

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "In English we must use adjectives to distinguish the different kinds of love for which the ancients had distinct names." - Mortimer Adler

"Most Covens never get beyond 3 members, 4 if they happen to get along extremely well or have a 4 way split bond," Esme spoke while she hiked at what she was insisting was a Human pace. Charlie readily followed her feeling like he was being hit by his own gift due to the agonizing speed they were going.

The trail wasn't as well worn as most, but Charlie figured it was simply because of the fact that the Denali were the ones who'd made it, and it wasn't like they needed to walk across the forest floor all the time. According to Esme, this was his practice for going into the village. She claimed it was never too early to start training to act like a person.

Really it had to be torture for something he hadn't figure out yet.

"If that's the case then aren't we a bit.. big? The Cullens are too..." the man trailed off as he sort of shrugged, his hands were tucked in his hunting jacket that he didn't need, but the weight was a comfort due to how familiar it was. A piece of his Human life.

"Well we're the Big 3," Esme smiled and tossed a sparkling glance at him, her amber eyes shimmering with excitement to share knowledge he had yet to be given. She wasn't so much in front of him as one step ahead. In any case, Charlie made sure to stay at her elbow in the event that he caught a scent he shouldn't,

"The Volturi are the ruling class but The Olympic, and The Denali are the only Covens large enough to demand titles which are recognized by them.

"We're much smaller of course. The Volturi have agents stationed all over the world that rotate and report back to the 3 Kings. Aro, Caius, and Marcus have been obsessed with the Secrecy and protection of our kind since they overthrew the Romanian Coven."

"How many members of the Volturi are there?" Charlie frowned a bit at the idea of a Coven larger than Carlisle or Esme's which drank Human blood,

"I mean...Wouldn't more than a few Vampires be hard to hide?"

He had more questions, obviously, but this was the one that was rattling in his head.

"There are 6 core members. The 3 Kings, Aro, Marcus, and Caius as well as their 3 Queens. Supulcia, Athendora, and Didyme.

"10 members of the regular guard, and roughly 36 belonging to Prince Covens which report from throughout the world. "

Then as if she was about to impart a particularly juicy tidbit, Esme knocked into his shoulder lightly,

"Though The Olympic Coven is never inspected as Carlisle has personal correspondence with Aro. The Same with Eleazar. After the Upheaval of 1173, the 3 Kings have made sure not to grow complacent with their Seat in Italy.

"Of course they don't feed it in the City, it's actually forbidden for anyone to feed in Volterra, and when The Kings are in residence of the Castle, they have food brought to them from outside of their territory"

Charlie swallowed hard at how thorough the Volturi seemed to watch over the Vampires across the world and tried not to let his anxiety build at the thought of a Coven having 52 members, 36 of which were scattered across the world.

"Upheaval? What was that then?"

"Not everyone likes keeping the Secret, the battle was fought by several small Covens deciding that Vampires should be revealed to the wider world. To be the superior race in the light, " Esme informed him easily as she kicked a small stone with only enough force to have it flying into the under brush gently, as if she was actually Human. Her tone though was clearly disapproving,

"But the Volturi have always been first and foremost concerned with the Survival of our Race. The 3 Kings made the laws to protect us and to them the law is the closest thing to a Bible our Kind possesses."

That... It didn't sit well with him to think the ruling Coven treated their own rules as Gospel. Even the Founding Fathers had hoped the Constitution would be rewritten as times changed,

"Do they ever add to the Laws? Take away?"

Humming for a moment Esme seemed distracted by something in the trees that Charlie's own keen eyes couldn't capture. Maybe she was lost in the past or her own memories, whatever it was it had the Vampire woman sighing,

"Add? Yes. Take away? I've never seen it."

"So the laws..." Charlie trailed off and dug through his head over the past few months. They hadn't said much, just some basic things to make sure he knew how serious this new life was,

"They are to keep Vampires Secret from any Human which is not Bound by a Mating Call. Any human to discover the truth must be killed or Changed.

"No changing kids under 15. Feeding has to be inconspicuous. Dealing with Werewolves is forbidden, because apparently those are real...

"No accusing people of crimes if it's untrue. Don't expose yourself to Humans in the sun, and a Vampire's Sire is responsible for them, but if their Creator is dead, that Newborn's Mate's Coven are permitted to take over their care."

"Good," Esme sounded like a proud mother, her smile evident in her bright tone as if he's passed some sort of quiz, "Those are the laws. That is all."

"That's all?" kicking up some dirt, Charlie frowned even deeper than before as he dug up a large chunk of ground, which wasn't his intention, but he kept walking anyways,

"Seems like too few for a Coven that sounds like they're trying to keep an iron fist."

"The Volturi aren't evil Charlie," Esme laughed almost indulgently at his words but he still wasn't so sure. Laws should always be flexible, then again... All the ones he'd been given were pretty easy to follow...

Most had to do with Feeding and Changing people. Both were things he didn't plan on having any issues with because there was no way he was going to kill anyone and the thought of biting someone and letting go was far too harrowing. Why the hell would he want to make someone anyways?!

That was crazy.

"They're just trying to make sure we're all kept safe. With the way Human technology has developed, how they've always feared the unknown and the other... Really what choice do we have?

"Things were different when the Romanians ruled. People didn't have the things they had now and the Volturi had the foresight to conceal us before it happened."

Fear.

It seemed the Volturi were guided by fear of destruction from discovery. Yet... If that was all, they could have simply just hidden themselves away in a remote place. Could they really just want to protect their entire species? A Benevolent but powerful set of Rulers who did what had to be done for the betterment of their kind?

Every time Charlie had ever heard of such a thing, it tended to be a scam.

Power maybe?

He wouldn't really be able to say without meeting them. Withholding judgment was always the smart thing. Hadn't he always refused to make a call without hard facts? If.. If Eleazar liked them, and Carlisle too... There had to be a truth to their purpose. Neither of those men were the kind to be taken in by pretty words and lies.

Though Charlie couldn't completely just accept them.

The idea that anyone just.. Fed on Humans was still terrifying to him. Even if he'd almost done it himself, that was no excuse. He couldn't ever reconcile that as normal, or even acceptable. An accident would likely always be horrifying to him, regardless of who'd done it.

Murder was murder.

Right?

Charlie was still nervous that such a thing would change in his mind.

In the end he only grunted, unsure of what to really say, but Esme smiled as if she understood his conflicted attitude on the matter. Really, hearing that there was a Coven that big with several sets of eyes and ears scattered across the world was near enough to make a man paranoid. He was glad to hear that they wouldn't be getting Audits or whatever. Apparently the Denali had proven their loyalty enough and Charlie was just a little nervous about having to be presented to the 3 Kings if they liked the Denali so much...

It was.

A lot.

Would Bella face the same thing? She was marrying Carlisle right? So she, more than Charlie, would likely face the scrutiny of the Ruling Coven. That rankled his nerves even more than the previous thought. Bella was... Bella. She was just a girl, no matter what poetry or whatever nonsense Carlisle wanted to spout. In the face of Royalty. what could she say or do for them not to scoff at her?

Charlie and Carlisle saw her worth, how amazing she was, but... Would they just brush her off like the rest of the world had? Such a thought was enough to get him breathing deeply in an attempt to prevent his skin from crawling or a growl from escaping his chest. One thought came to him then.

If Bella ever was presented to the Ruling Coven, Charlie wanted to be there.

Carlisle was smart and wouldn't do it until she'd been... Changed. So Charlie would just have to ask some time before then. He was her father. What argument could be made against that?

"We're here!" Esme cheered as they reached an overlook. The cliff towered over a rushing river whose banks were blanketed with an abundance of snow. The forest was still sleeping but Charlie found the sight rather breathtaking anyways. Winter and Summer had their own appeals and the slumbering wilds of the icy seasons was easy to appreciate,

"A decade or so back the boys took a tumble down here while wrestling. It's a beautiful hike though so I come down her when I feel like just absorbing nature."

Inhaling and letting the various scents of the area, as well as Esme's own wash over him, Charlie found the whole thing a bit relaxing, a welcome reprieve from his anxious thoughts as he attempted to take in the majesty of the overlook. Esme had good tastes in picnic spots. She was less outdoorsy but still rough and tumble, something Charlie could appreciate. Tanya was lucky to have her and vice versa. Really, the fact they were Bonded wasn't surprising, though the idea that they were awaiting a third was a bit harder to wrap his head around.

Esme and Tanya just seemed so... Perfect already.

Charlie couldn't imagine someone else in the middle of all that history. Then again, Irina had been happy to have him pop into her life that she'd been living for over 1000 years. So, who was he to say anything? Just because he didn't understand at the moment didn't mean he might not eventually....

"I can see why. It's nice. Peaceful."

"Tanya proposed to me up here," Esme closed her eyes, clearly lost to the memory of it as she grinned, all her teeth showing, "She didn't have a ring. Well she did but she dropped it down the bank when her and Kate had been roughhousing. Kate had been teasing Tanya all day... and poof! There went the box.."

Charlie couldn't help the snort that escaped him at the image of that, really, he could picture the two harassing each other, Irina egging them both on until the precious piece of jewelry was lost,

"Did you ever find it."

"Yeah," Esme opened her eyes then, and tossed him such a smile Charlie couldn't help but think that he might be starting to love with her the same way he was getting to love Kate. It wasn't love yet, just a gentle sprout of comfort and affection in his chest for a woman who'd taken his hand and decided he was her responsibility. Like an older sister he'd never had. Like Tanya.

"We spent the whole night looking for it. Carmen found it, and it hasn't left my finger since."

"It's a nice story," he sighed, really thinking about how funny that would have been to experience. How very normal the whole thing sounded. How Human.

"I like telling Vampires it. I mean... I can't exactly tell it to Humans... They don't..."

Understand.

Charlie suddenly, if reluctantly, recalled that Humans were awful sometimes and two ladies being in love wasn't something most accepted. He himself had been raised better but most weren't so lucky. He understood then, what Esme meant, why she agreed with the secrecy.

If Human's weren't able to accept her love, how could they accept her species? Especially when every other Vampire fed on people. They wouldn't care if her eyes were gold. No Human would trust any of them.

Startling was the realization that he was happy Vampires didn't' judge like that. Really....

"Is that something you lose? In the mental shift? Intolerance?"

"Not as such," Esme didn't sound angry just kind, "Species just becomes more important than gender or race. You start seeing matters blind to things such as young or old, even Asian or African-american. Your mind hones in on just Human and Vampire. That's it.

"Everything else falls away.

"Why wouldn't it? Why would you fool yourself into thinking that a woman can't kill you when it's possible she may have a gift that completely immobilizes you? A tiny young Asian woman might be physically stronger simply because she did more physical labor in her Human life.

"You can't judge on those things so your brain doesn't even bother with it."

Charlie let that sink in and recalled how appalled he'd been when that girl had dragged him towards the Vampire that had bitten him. His panic had been so overwhelming because she hand't been much bigger than Bella but she'd just tossed Charlie around like a rag doll.

He thought of Alice then, she was ity bitty, yet the idea that she could probably curb stomp Emmett because of her prescience wasn't exactly surprising.... Suddenly letting go of his Human thought patterns didn't seem all negative. Maybe that was the Vampire taking over already though....

There was no way of telling.

"Don't be so concerned over it Charlie," Esme looped her arm into his and he found he didn't mind it too much, it wasn't as comforting as Irina and Kate but the sensation was close,

"You'll still be you."

She sounded so sure, it made him want to believe more than ever before...

* * *

"Cut it out Emmett!" Bella was chuckling as she pulled the phone from her ear audibly and Charlie basked in the warm tones of her voice as she openly scolded,

"Unless you want me to put you to work and have you cut the steak, get out of the kitchen!"

"You heard your mother," Carlisle's voice was close, and there was a sound of chopping which told Charlie the Doctor was actually helping Bella prepare her food,

"Go back to your brothers or grab a knife."

"gaaaahhh!!" Emmett groaned but it was much further away as it drifted off, the boy likely leaving the kitchen. Charlie smiled at all the lively noises coming from his daughter's side of the line and took a breath to remind himself that she was happy.

"Sorry dad," Bella was back to the speaker full attention to the conversation, though there was still a trace of humor in her tone, "What were you saying? About the trees?"

"I was saying, Esme and Irina brought me some tools and a good pile of oak to work with from the village, just something to start with," Charlie informed her softly of his intentions to actually try woodworking. As silly as it nearly seemed, but he knew if he liked it.... Well he'd get a while to become really good at it,

"To keep busy y'know. It get's boring out here with nothing to do.... Especially when you don't sleep."

Bella made a noise that sounded more than a little excited as she asked, "You have any plans for your first project?"

"Well, if I'm gonna learn to carve properly... Everything I've been reading has said to start with simple animals, small ones," Charlie stared at the pictures of Bella and her friends which were hanging in the room. The other members of his Coven were milling about but all his focus was on the sounds coming from the phone pressed to his ear.

There was a cheer in the distance, the kids playing some game as Bella's tone maintained a steady interest,

"Really? Are you going to change it up or are you going to have a small army of owls just marching around the house? Maybe you can make some rabbits too.."

Bella trailed off and Charlie was slightly concerned before she continued teasingly, "Better not, they'll start a war and you'll have a mess on your hands."

The thought had Charlie letting out a sigh at the odd words, Bella was... He'd discovered she was kind of a strange one. Similar to Renee in a much more chaotic sense than he'd never known. It was almost as if Bella was slowly opening up and revealing that she was an Alien.

It was...

Charlie was starting to understand what she'd meant that day in the kitchen when saying no one really understood her. Contemplating the knowledge, the man heard Carlisle chuckling nearby before Bella's voice was once again a little distant,

"No, not like that. I bought a garlic crusher it's in the drawer in your left, no the other left. Don't make that face Dr. Cullen I'm trying to talk to my father!"

Once again she was back to paying Charlie her complete attention, "I'd vote for an Owl President though, they'd win. They have the aerial advantage and the rabbits are their natural prey."

Instead of asking what the hell she was even saying Charlie just let himself accept that she had a rather... Interesting sense of humor if Carlisle's incessant chuckling was anything to go by as Bella weaved her tale.

"Then I guess I'll have to make owls," Charlie wasn't actually sure why but he was smiling. Maybe it was because, despite her oddities, Bella was trying to open up to him more than she ever had. Perhaps it was because, even though Charlie himself thought it was a bit odd, Carlisle was laughing as if she was the most hilarious person he'd ever met. Either way it was nice to hear his daughter in her element with people who appreciated her.

Even if it was parts of her Charlie was still discovering.

"Sorry, next time I'll try to be sure to finish cooking and lock myself in the room before you call," Bella's voice was drenched in apology, as if her having a life with the Cullens bothered him. It was one thing for Leah to stay quiet and make herself scarce, the girl was Bella's housemate and friend... But...

The Cullens had been Bella's Coven, the one she'd been hiding away from him for months on end. Charlie's mind brought up Bella shaking her spoon at Edward and scolding him.

"It's fine," Charlie insisted and was surprised to find himself being completely truthful as Eleazar made some sort 'ooooop' noise across the house, while Carmen and Esme were laughing in the the living room. The house he lived in was so much more lively than the one in Forks, something about the fact that it was bustling with activity was comforting. Knowing Bella had the same thing? That Charlie could hear her experiencing it...

Part of him found a ridiculous amount of comfort in that paired with the knowledge that she was still free to spend days with Harry or Leah. Angela was running around with her and Bella even sprinkled Lauren Mallory's name into there once in a while.

"It's not like it's any quieter over here."

He was granted a small chuckle but Charlie wasn't sure why she found that particular statement funny, then Bella was moving on, "So, why Oak? Is it better for beginners?"

"It's just a harder wood," he explained and suddenly the man felt a little shy, embarrassed as he confessed to her, "It'll have less chance of splintering if I apply a bit too much pressure. When I get really good I might be able to work with whatever I want but Oak is sturdy."

"That makes sense," Bella replied smoothly, not even surprised. Her amusement had tapered out as if she was being sure that he knew she wasn't making fun of him or laughing behind his back.

Suddenly, he'd had enough of talking about himself, if Harry was to be believed, Bella was never sharing enough about herself, "What about you? Your friends keeping you busy?"

"Leah has decided to donate blood for mad science and I'm trying to convince Carlisle not to let Emmett taste it since I told him he couldn't do it himself, " Bella replied and Charlie nearly choked. She had to be messing around there was no way in hell Bella wasn't just trying to trick him into freaking out.

"I don't get why that would be funny," He managed to force out and Charlie knew if his heart hadn't already been frozen it would have stopped dead as Bella replied sounding exhausted,

"Yeah, it's not. I keep telling Emmett that but he's serious."

"What do you mean she's donating blood for mad science?" Charlie took a breath and ran a hand through his hair. At the moment there were plenty of thing rushing through his head. Distress, a fair dose of disgust at the idea of drinking Leah's blood, mostly he was more than just a little confused,

"What is Carlisle planning on doing with it?!"

"He just wants to check out the Shape-Shifter's DNA and Leah's willing to do it for compensation," Bella was practically deadpanning the words and Charlie realized she was about as happy over this as he himself was.

"It's very fascinating stuff," Carlisle called out as if Charlie actually cared how interesting Leah's blood was.

"Yeah but Emmett doesn't have to drink it," Bella replied, but her tone wasn't so angry, more... Completely and utterly grossed out,

"Anyways. That's my life at the moment. That and Sue's friend... Lisa. Lisa's taken on the house and so we have a realtor's sign out front and everything now.

"Nobody's called about it but if we get a buyer Carlisle's promised to be there in case we get a weirdo. Leah could handle it but.. Y'know."

Leah couldn't exactly kick someone to the curb without drawing too much attention. Especially if they were bigger than her. Really, Charlie was glad Bella had someone to be dealing with this sort of stuff. He wasn't about to thank Carlisle though. He wasn't there yet. He might not ever be.

Being honest with himself, Charlie had no idea how to respond to any of that so he settled for, "Well, that sounds.. Exciting. What about school?"

Heaving a heavy sigh, Bella sounded a little reluctant but Charlie was proud that she didn't wait too long before replying, "I'm going to College for a Bachelor's in literature. My first choice is Cornell because Lauren is applying for Fashion Design... With her blog and art grades she might just get in and... If we both get in we're thinking about trying to rent together. Put an add out for two more girls or something....

"I applied to a few other Schools but I'm.. I'm really hoping for Ithaca."

Swallowing back several emotions Charlie found himself adjusting the way he was sitting on the bed as he took a breath. Attempting to formulate the burning question blaring in his head like a bonfire on a winter's night,

"What about the Cullens?"

Silence. Only for a few moments before Carlisle whispered into Bella's ear, "Tell him Darling, he''ll be happy."

The words rankled Charlie's delicate nerves as his skin began to buzz with anxiety while his brain ran wild with all the reasons Carlisle would just leave Bella to her own devices in a state she'd never been in her life. What could have caused the Vampire to be alright with that?! Leaving her all alone! Sure there'd be Lauren, but that wasn't exactly a guarantee.

Lauren wasn't Leah or Angela either! She didn't know, couldn't know!

"Carlisle has a house in Ithaca," Bella informed him cautiously and Charlie noted that the noise Carlisle had been making, chopping or whatever had ceased completely. The only sound was the kids in the distance and Bella's breathing as she continued,

"But... Edward and Carlisle got me thinking.... I should.. I should experience College for real. Y'know dorm life and crunch time. Dating..."

"Dating?!"

"Well dating Carlisle but it's still going out, having to make plans to see each other.... going days with only phone calls..." Bella trailed off as if she was unsure, like even she still wasn't convinced on the whole thing but was doing it because Carlisle had fought for it viciously,

"Can't do that if I'm living with him."

Pressing his lips together Charlie closed his eyes and in that moment he loved Carlisle Cullen to death as he took a shuddering breath, while Venom filled his eyes with tears which would never spill over, yet were filled with all the comfort and joy of knowing that his little girl wouldn't be getting married straight out of high school.

That she'd be waiting a bit longer.

"Anyways, it's not like I'm the one who wants to get married and so if Carlisle wants to put it off I'm fine. It's not like we're not already Bonded. That's more permanent than flimsy piece of paper."

Exhaling slowly, Charlie finally found the words to say, "I think that's a great idea. Even if it's just for a year or so. You've never been allowed to just relax a little, live like a teenager away from home.

"As much as I hate agreeing with Carlisle, if I can't walk you down the aisle, I want you to do this. Live with a bunch of girls and just be a kid for a bit longer.

"I never got that. You have the chance and I want you to take it."

"Well if you want me to then yeah, I'll do it for sure," her tone was suddenly full of such conviction Charlie was shocked with how much sway he held over this girl. His little girl he'd been so scared he was losing. Maybe she was just trying to make up for things, for hurting him. Whatever it may have been, Charlie didn't' care. If it meant she got to stay his baby a little longer then so be it.

Bella deserved better than to graduate high school only to be married and be forced to play house while trying to get her degree. There was no rush.

They had forever.

God.

Charlie was so damn glad that she wasn't the kind of girl who wanted a wedding as soon as possible. Really, Bella was kind of right though. If Irina was to be believed, Bella's Bond to Carlisle was more permanent than an exchange of vows or rings any Human ceremony could provide.

"Just be ready for all your other roommates to drool over your boyfriend, I just hope they don't think he's your dad," Charlie somehow found it in himself not to gag on the words. Bella snorted out a laugh and Carlisle continued whatever chopping he'd been doing before.

"Dad please, Jasper's been trying to convince him to get a teaching position," Bella sighed sounding humored but distressed, "I don't need any more jokes about how scandalized my roommates are going to be."

That was nearly too much for him.

Only nearly though.


	8. April

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “How many slams in an old screen door? Depends how loud you shut it. How many slices in a bread? Depends how thin you cut it. How much good inside a day? Depends how good you live ’em. How much love inside a friend? Depends how much you give ’em.” – Shel Silverstein

On April 10th, Charlie had the very strange thought of, ' _I've missed the Superbowl.'_

And that was enough to have him laughing, honest to God shaking with the force of the emotion where he was sitting on the porch doing his best to carve a tiny owl and nearly doing a half decent job. Well, compared to the half dozen already standing proudly on the railing. They were messy, created with little skill and he couldn't help but laugh even harder as he stomped his foot lightly in his mirth only for them to shake before tumbling onto the deck.

If he was still Human he may have sliced his finger open with the carving knife.

As it was, Charlie was beginning to feel like he may be going insane all over again as the comfort that one thought provided swept through him. The Superbowl. Really. Of all things to be concerned about and in that moment he took a grounding breath as Tanya popped her head out of the house,

"You dying out here for a reason Chief?"

"Does anyone know who won the Superbowl?" he asked between his near hysterics which only caused Tanya to raise an eyebrow at him in what could only be described as endearment.

"Not off the top of my head..."

Eleazar said much the same from across the house and an echo of unsurety swept through the the entire Coven where each of them went about their day. Charlie heard it all. Covering his mouth the man once more attempted to gather himself as he felt like a child at the sudden turn of his mood but...

"You alright?" Tanya was tilting her head in concern then, Irina sounded as if she was about to pull herself out of the game room where she and Esme were playing Air Hockey in Doubles with Carmen and Kate.

"I'm fine, I'm... I'm perfect," Charlie sighed as he basked in the feeling of his feet being firm on the ground. In Alaska, with a family that he cared about, was slowly getting to love. He'd never thought he'd have a family again and here he was... Still, though, Charlie was even more blown back by the mundanity of it all.

He was still him.

Upset he'd missed the Superbowl as if the last 5 and a half months weren't a valid reason to have done so. Charlie hadn't even asked Harry or Billy in their recent calls because he hadn't even bothered.

He'd forgotten.

And here he was now.

A Vampire wondering about the Superbowl.

Irina wasn't content with that answer as she made to leave her game so Charlie, knowing it wasn't a big deal assured her, "It's fine Irina... I'm alright. I just realized a few things. I'll tell you when your done. Keep having fun with your sisters."

"If you're sure..." Irina trailed clearly a bit bothered but she knew him well enough now to accept the words for what they were. The truth.

Really.

What was she going to do? Stand there and just hear Charlie keep laughing about how.. How himself he was feeling?

That's what it was.

He was feeling like himself more than ever as if he'd only just been pretending and now, here, sitting on the porch carving rather misshapen owls, wondering about Football, and listening to the noises of the house, it was like being comfy. Home for the first time since perhaps those months he and Renee had been living in Forks when his Parents looked like they might still recover. Before everything fell apart. Now the entire world was so different.

Bella was out there with a man from the 1600s while Charlie was dating a woman even older. Yet he was wondering about American Sports like none of that mattered. Feeling like all of that just made Charlie's life his own.

Some things were the same. Billy and Harry were talking to him, Bella would be getting her College letters soon and finals would be starting so he'd have to make sure she was getting the rest she needed.

Some things were different. Bella was as good as Married... And Charlie was planning on Calling his sort-of-son-in-law and asking what the hell he was thinking being intimate with Bella when she's still so fragile. Because Charlie'd realized that at some point and nearly had a melt down. The house he'd lived in since he was in his 20s was being sold off. Billy and Harry had magic in their blood while their kids were Shape-Shifters.

For the first time, Charlie wasn't feeling a fleeting joy or happiness. No, it was an ease of slowly settling contentment.

Happy that he knew.

Grateful because most of that would have been true, had been true before, only he'd never ever been told and couldn't be.

"I'm sure Sweetheart," Charlie said the words, addressing Irina who was still in the game room but could hear him just fine. The affectionate nickname, one he'd never ever used with anyone but Bella, it felt right. True and good. Irina accepted it before continuing her game as the man ignored Tanya's assessing gaze while he moved to pick up the owls which had fallen from their perches.

He didn't move at Human speed but Charlie also didn't rush it as there was time enough in the day and night. What he did do at Human pace was place them all back in their row exactly how he'd remembered them. Perfectly in order as his mind was a steel trap which couldn't dare forget it.

"You're doing good Chief," Tanya smiled instead of actually saying anything more probing. Charlie supposed that it was better than meaningless words or harassment when he'd not done anything but find himself feeling less like he was lost in the woods and more simply existing in different way somewhere else.

"I am."

So he kept carving his owls, slowly but surely growing more skilled and confident with the knife. Even to the point where he'd memorized how to hold the wood just so for each stroke so that it wouldn't splinter or crack. Charlie kept placing them all on every free surface in the room he could and Irina began snatching them all up, hiding the little figures through the house like some sort of silly game of where's waldo and it made him think he just might love her already.

Even as Kate tossed one at his head, which he caught easily before she rather petulantly declared, "Tell Irina if I find another owl in my shower I'm going to start returning them without heads."

"She can hear you," Charlie reminded his, well, his sister he supposed as he continued with his newest project of carving a small hinged chest. He spared a moment to pick up the owl and found himself a bit lost as to what he should do with it since it was one of his earlier ones, and seemed a bit sad,

"Besides if you find more just give em to me and I'll take care of it."

"She'll just hide them again," Kate crossed her arms and Charlie hummed, turning is attention back to the box which he was sort of miserably failing at. It was only his third so he was sure that so long as he finished it through, like the owls, he'd get damn good at it,

"I'm planning on sending them all to Bella, she knows that so if you're really gonna break them she'll stop."

Seeming content with that Kate sighed, her shoulders slumped, "Sorry for throwing it at your head."

"S'fine, I know you weren't actually trying to hit me," He shrugged, really he was getting used to the dynamic of the house. It was really a big family, even though he'd been an only child, he recognized the shenanigans from Billy's own horde of sisters.

There was a pause as Kate looked around the area Charlie had claimed just out back of the house. Esme was making plans to build him as small back house to use when he graduated to power tools, for the noise but at the moment he just had a work table with a bench and the like. It wasn't much but he was sure that he'd get a little more of an advanced workplace if he proved he was dedicated to the whole thing.

"Why are you sending the owls to Bella?" Kate suddenly broke the quiet which Charlie had been using to judge his poor box which he'd likely end up just turning into wood chips for mulch or something.

"She'll find it funny. Don't know why but I just think she will," he shrugged because he was confident, even if he didn't really get the joke. Bella would laugh. Probably.

"Well... before you do tell me so I can take one for myself," Kate requested and that had Charlie pausing, turning to the woman slowly as confusion bubbled up through his head like a simmering pot left on the stove too long,

"I thought you said you didn't like them?"

"Not when they're watching me shower," was the rather reasonably miffed response and yeah, Charlie could get that. If Irina had left one in their shower he'd be a bit weirded out by the thing staring him down like some sort of haunted doll. He didn't care that he was the one making them.

"Alright," really it was all he could say as he nodded lightly before reaching into his tool box to grab the first owl he'd made. It was wonky and a bit pathetic but Charlie had only, in his excitement, made about a half dozen perfect ones and those were all hidden around the house still.

Not even he knew where Irina had sequestered them.

"Here ya go then," Charlie tossed the thing to her and, as expected, Kate caught the thing with ease before frowning at it, he offered her a light smile,

"It's ugly but it's my first one. Bella named it 'What'."

"What?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"No, What."

"Your daughter's weird," Kate replied rolling her eyes but shoved the little thing into her pocket without actually complaining about it, Charlie couldn't help but think there was a bit of affection there.

"I'm coming to terms with that," he shrugged as Kate shook her head a little at the words before kicking some snow at him which Charlie only hopped a way from as the woman sighed,

"You going hunting today? Esme said she was going on a trip when she got back from the Village."

"I should," Charlie replied as he simply shoved his box away because there was nothing for it, he couldn't focus too much on the thing and talking to Kate was more important. He was supposed to be moving to hunting only once very two weeks starting in May, then in June he'd only go once a month like the rest of them.

Because they were able to fill up every trip, feeding wasn't exactly something they were required to do often. Charlie was still caught up over the fact that his eyes were now a mustardy rusted yellow when he was full. He couldn't' help but think that this trip would be the one where he came back and they were solid gold like everyone else's.

"Well, if you do I'm sure we'll have a bit of fun," Kate informed him lightly as she began making her way towards the steps leading up to the back door of the house,

"Thanks for What."

Charlie turned back to his workspace and replied easily, "No problem."

Kate practically skipped her way back into the house then as and Charlie tuned out her trek. Later, when Bella had all the owls with the exception of What, Kate would start hiding the bird around the house. It would become an everyday little game, whoever found the little guy had to hide him... Finding meant bragging rights, and they each kept track of who'd hidden him the best, but everyone knew What belonged to Kate.

Charlie didn't know it at the time as he once more stared at the horrible hinged box, but Kate would be his favorite sister and What was really just the beginning.

* * *

A nervous energy which felt more like excitement than anxiety buzzed through their hunting party. Kate, Irina, and Esme formed a triangle with Charlie at the center as they all flew through the woods, opening their senses up completely in an attempt to search out a potential target for their thirst.

Charlie's throat had begun to itch and burn not long after his conversation with Kate about her owl so he'd given up his project entirely. Now, as the dusk was settling over them, he knew he'd be spending the next day or so with his sisters and Mate to soothe it.

He was never a very talkative person, and now that Charlie was getting close to having his mind back completely, he wasn't one to enjoy the more aggressive parts of the hunt.

This.

Kate and Irina shoving each other and attempting to leap farther than the other, while Esme maintained a steady eye over Charlie himself, the sound of near silent fun and camaraderie. That was what he was finding himself enjoying the most when he went out for blood. The bonding experience of it all made the section of sky in him feel like it was spreading out into the brightest of blues right into his veins and Charlie wondered what Irina's part of the bond felt like. Could she feel how content he was with the time spent together with their family just existing and feeling free.

Losing himself to his senses among the pine and brush while they all searched for a distant scent, a heart beat or skittering.

"I'll race you to those logs from last time," Kate challenged suddenly and Charlie realized she was talking to him, he noted that Esme was frowning as he attempted to formulate a reply. Before he could, their Coven's Matriarch shook her head,

"Charlie's still a Newborn, no separating from the group."

Kate let out a low exhale as she shrugged as if to say 'what can you do', "I guess I'm just getting a head of myself."

All he could do was smile, because really, Charlie was looking forwards to seeing where he measured, pushing himself and finding his place on the scale. Control was knowing what damage you could do and holding back from it. If it was safe to test his strength, speed, and hearing he would.

Already the power of his Newborn months was fading and he found it easier to go hunting without breaking bones and getting messy from his lack of restraint. Though... His nose and ears hadn't faded as much as his physical power or sight. Later his nose would dampen but Charlie's ears would always be a point of pride.

A small heartbeat caught his attention as they ran and Charlie called out quietly, "Rabbit 11 O'Clock headed to 12."

After a moment, they'd run he again declared, "Closing on 6"

Then after a little longer, Esme who was ahead of him finally declared, "I hear it. What's it running from?"

Tilting his head Charlie focused, "Fox, male. just hit 1."

Kate shot forwards keen on the small sip as she rushed to cut the predator off, no doubt not even being able to hear the beast yet. According to Eleazar if his any of his senses were any keener he'd easily be mistaken for a Hunter. It seemed that his sense of hearing would simply be an advanced trait. Like Edward's speed and Emmett's strength. 

Something trained from his Human life which simply manifested into a superior attribute which was a cut above average but less than a Gift.

That April his nose was still on another level though, which explained why he was capable of smelling it when the other's didn't.

Blood.

Human.

Saccharine and thick.

He bolted off from the party as the monster made quite the valiant effort to pull him out his place in the driver's seat, attempting to shove Charlie right to the back. He didn't close his eyes this time. He didn't rock himself cowardly as his legs moved without his say.

Charlie fought.

Fought like a father of 1 teen girl who looked at him and had faith.

Like a the youngest, newest member of a Coven of 7 Animal drinkers, filled with Siblings and a Mate who believed in him.

Charlie broke out his teeth and claws to pummel that wild thing he'd kept down for the sake of his new family, even as that tempting forbidden smell grew stronger, filling his mouth with so much Venom his jaw was aching. And when he registered Esme and Irina in his radius, the beast tried to push out his Field.

The man slammed down on his own breaks screaming.

NO.

_NO._

**_NO._ **

And it was relief that flooded him when Irina's marble form slammed into his own with a mighty crash like a hardwood falling to the ground, bowing with the power of time and wind which had worked on it for ages. Charlie screamed out, but the Humans were still far as he was near weeping. Once more, the man found himself slamming his fists into that monster which lived in his head, the one he was perfectly aware was his own instincts.

With Esme's help, Irina dragged him struggling away from the sickly sweet scent of what had to be plenty of blood. An accident of some sort. Even as Charlie struggled he fought to keep himself still enough to be hauled away from the threat of his own mind and body. So much so that he'd force his lungs and nose to stop breathing at some point. Whatever blood he could still smell was residual and lingered only in his lungs as it coated his mouth with the forbidden promise of ambrosia.

The moment their trio was cleared of the danger zone, Charlie gasped for air in an attempt to dilute the scent still lingering in his lungs as well as his burning throat while Irina and Esme held on tight to ensure he wouldn't bolt again.

"I'm fine, it's gone, let me go," Charlie huffed out as, at last, only the aroma of pine and earth, perhaps the less appetizing forest creatures such as rabbits, filled his lungs and nose. Slowly, carefully ready to pounce again, the two women did as he asked. Kate arrived then her eyes more copper than the black she'd been sporting before.

"Holy shit, I missed a party."

"Charlie didn't use his gift on us," Esme enthused as if she was a mother who'd just been told her kid got straight As on his quarterly. Was a sure shot for Honor Roll,

"He even stopped breathing when we were carrying him off!"

"Damn!" Kate whistled low as if she was actually proud and not teasing, hell, she looked genuinely impressed by it, "You really had to show us all up didn't you?!"

"I almost did it again," He groaned before Irina laid hold of his coat in order to spin him around to face her, he noted the black of her eyes was deep before, surprisingly, she laid a kiss on his lips. It was soft and gentle but full of exuberance. The tenderness of the gesture made Charlie feel like a kid again as he fell into the moment, simply returning it. How could he not?

"You didn't though, " Irina sighed against him the moment she pulled away from their embrace, "You didn't even use your Gift."

"I didn't want to do it," Charlie replied, guilt still gnawing at him, as he felt a bit nauseous to realize he wasn't feeling as bad as he had before,

"I wanted you to stop me .Besides, I don't want to use my Gift on you."

Bringing her tiny, gentle hands to cup his face Irina beamed like a shooting star, no, a sunrise causing his chest to feel like daybreak, as the clouds parted to reveal the sun before she reminded him,

"You used it on me last time."

Oh, and how Charlie's heart soared as he realized what that meant!

How much of his mind he'd retained in those moments, not from his own fortitude, but having borrowed the strength from the Vampires surrounding him. No one needed to tear his head off and Charlie didn't need to feel bad about ruining the trip. They could go hunt in the other direction and maybe make sure to give that section of the forest a wider berth since he would smell it before the rest of them.

They could work with this.

Life would go on.

There would be no need for anger or tears.

Next time, he'd have to fight again. Next time he'd be stronger because he'd keep relying on the family he'd found himself in.

Charlie closed his eyes and let it go.

He let it go because that's what he had to do to keep living, to go on and be better, to remember that moment and say NO, I didn't do it last time so I won't do it now, because I never want to feel how I did that first time. I never want to know what it feels like to kill.

Their hunting party regrouped and they continued on until late into the next day in another portion of their forest territory. Charlie was able to take down two moose and aided Irina with her own hunt. Not that she needed help, it just felt good to be able to take down prey and allow someone else to feed because your own belly was full.

Irina had done it for him once and the feeling of being the one to hold the beast down for Irina was overwhelmingly intimate. To be capable of sharing that moment together... Watching her guzzle down the blood of a moose while he made no move to take any for himself, even though he'd gone nearly mad earlier for the same substance he was forgoing as she filled her own belly.

She was too precious for him to fight with over food, he wouldn't ever do it, there was no need, he was full and she wasn't. Helping her this way was near enough to making dinner or setting the table. A gentlemanly gesture and Charlie may have thought it strange before, but now he simply basked in the feeling of sharing the moment with her.

Finally, when each of them were sated, their quartet made their way back to the house, Irina linked her hand into his and informed him in low tones, "You know, sharing food like that? Mates who hunt Humans don't normally do that.

"Carmen and Eleazar, when they came to us, had never even thought of it. Even though the Bond is strong... Sharing food is a bit difficult because it is such a powerful instinct. It's possible for Human drinkers but requires self-control most don't care to practice."

"What gave you the Idea?" Charlie asked, returning her whispers with one of his own as if he might break the spell she was weaving.

"Our cousins do it. Apparently one of them was very messy as a Newborn and their prey would bleed out. So, their Mate would hold it down and they'd drink until the thirst was sated enough that their control would be strong enough to take down their next meal alone. They just kept doing it because of the closeness it provided."

"It's intimate," he agreed lightly, shifting his hold on her fingers as Esme and Kate followed behind having their own, less heavy conversation. Absently he wondered which of the Cullen pairs it was and realized it was likely Rosalie and Emmett. Alice and Jasper weren't Sired by Carlisle and according to what he'd been told, they'd met later in life.

"It's not just Mates though," Irina smiled, eyes sparkling, "Its an excellent Bonding moment. You and Kate should do it, maybe even you and Eleazar!

"Trust and love aren't exclusive to Mates after all. Maybe one day you can even do it for Bella."

Charlie swallowed back whatever mix of affection and awe he was feeling in the moment while it buzzed and bubbled in his chest as well as his lungs like a spring ready to burst forth from a pile of rocks which had blocked it up. Because she was right. The moment had been intimate in the same way as holding hands or a hug when you cried. It wasn't sexual or carnal. It was sharing and trusting, being trusted and loved.

That feeling of sureness and affection only grew and grew as his mind came to him and the feral tendencies which overwhelmed all but faded and Charlie was truly in the driver's seat everyday with that beast itching about in the back and occasionally in the passenger seat. Gradually, he grew firmly himself.

On the last day of April while the stars were out in the sky and he walked along a forest path with his Mate's hand in his, as Esme and Tanya trailed behind to keep an eye on him, because his Newborn months were not completely over just yet. Charlie realized, with the same clarity as he had the morning he wondered about the Superbowl, that he was wasting time. So, turning his now golden eyes to Irina, he rather clumsily fumbled,

"Marry me? When we get the approval, and when I can be around Bella... Will you marry me?"

Irina gasped as if she hadn't been expecting the request, as if they hadn't been talking about hurdling towards that at full tilt from the beginning.

There was no one he'd ever trust more than Irina, this family and this life had shown him that it was alright. That perhaps losing your Humanity wasn't... It wasn't the end. Perhaps Humanity wasn't the ability to love, care, even just be good. Maybe Humanity was a concept that was only toted around because fear. The same fear that made Esme and Tanya terrified to tell the Village they were married. 

"I'm not afraid anymore. As long as I'm with you, I don't think I'll ever be afraid to love again."

"Yes," Irina smiled and her bright golden eyes shimmered as she began to squeal before tackling Charlie to the ground in excitement,

"YES YES YES!!"

He didn't have a ring, and he didn't like the idea of her wearing the same one Renee had. Even if the set had belonged to his parents. Those would go to Bella, Charlie realized they likely didn't wear rings in the 1600s. So the Swan Family Rings would go to Bella while Charlie and Irina would have to go ring shopping.

Wedding planning could be done later, when he could be trusted in the Village and around Humans.

It wasn't a fancy proposal but it was what felt right.

Irina later called it perfect and Charlie...

Charlie was filled with a happiness that would never waver, fade, or falter.

Not just from Irina's love, but from the smiles of his family around him as they all cheered as well as danced the moment they got home and Charlie's Mate ran to the house crying out joyfully, "WE'RE ENGAGED!!!"

Esme and Tanya came up behind him, both woman smiling brightly before Tanya shoved Charlie's shoulder, saying nothing but her eyes told him enough. He'd done good.

It was a strange life, and but it was Charlie's.

He wasn't going to waste this second shot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And That's a wrap on this leg of the journey!!! WHAT A RIDE!! I'll see you in the next installment! 
> 
> Earthshine will be the name and I'll be posting it after another short break!


End file.
